A Few Words About Catfight Haven

[ofecteau]

I recently ran across an 8 minute clip from Catfight Haven. I hope its appearance there was an authorized promotion and not pirated. However, even if it was pirated, I cannot help but believe that its appearance will generate sales. It’s the best domestic product I have seen in some time. Remarkable, you might say, as it certainly has compelled me to remark.

All this must be preferenced by saying that the video quality, due I am sure to transfer, mars the viewing pleasure. But rather than be off-putting, it just makes me want to see it with what I am sure is the from-the-source download quality and clarity.

The clip features a blonde in bra being artfully defeated by a brunette (here is an example of the lack of clarity; the darker haired woman is so wonderful that I want to know every color streak in her expansive and loose mane). The action takes place in the narrow confines of a bed, which should be a powerfully constricting negative. But such is the skill of the dark haired woman that she actually makes the small space work to her advantage in a competitive way but even more so in a astoundingly artistic manner. I have reason to believe the dark haired woman is Renee, the proprietor of Catfight Haven. No idea the name of the blonde, as a trip to the website left me unable to figure out which video this was.

Lets talk about the negatives. I have already mentioned the bed, yet Renee (I am going to henceforth refer to her as such) actually makes it a positive. The blonde is in bra and I think shorts, both white. Renee is in matching burgundy (lack of clarity from the transfer) bra and panties, with an olive or grey skirt askew but secured around her waist and hips. The fact that this video does not at least go topless and Renee’s skirt removed should be, again, a powerful negative. But somehow she makes it work to great effect. Her movements and erotic sensibilities  are so advanced that I honestly cannot say the video would be improved by stripping away the garments. Renee ROCKS her bra/panty combo and loose skirt like Robert Plant rocks a mike . It shouldn’t work, like Jimmy Page with his guitar slung too low, but it does. Oh, my, it does.

The last negative is a bit sticky. Renee is not my physical type. She is  not FC’s Julianna or Sarah, who most certainly are. She is a bit too zaftig for me. Yet I find her hotter than hell. Its what I call the “Tina Fey Syndrome.” There should be no fucking way I could ever find Tina Fey hot. But I do. What happens is that it is IMPOSSIBLE not to figure in her INTELLIGENCE, which draws you in like a tractor beam. I know she is a great writer, and a talented comedic actress, but I believe all this springs from a very deep well of  intellectual brilliance. In other words, she is so goddamn obviously SMART that if affects the way you see her physically. This is an incredible thing to say about a woman who appears in and produces female fighting videos, but intelligence, raw mental horse power applied with discipline and focus, comes off Renee like steam. She is so advanced that, like a great winemaker or chef, she is not just looking to stimulate the crotch, but to engage the intellect. This puts her in a very small, and in her case, unique (and I mean ONE OF A KIND) set of classes: as a performer, she is in there with Alecia Ames (Joan Wise), Juliana(FC), Hannah/Janay (Academy) and Lucille (DWW). As a producer, her only peers would be  Marty(CW), Joan Wise, GR (DWW) and Bruce (Academy). She is the ONLY one with her feet in both camps. All due to how overwhelmingly fucking smart, focused and applied this woman is.

Now, the positives, where I will try to be more brief and wrap this up. There is not a tattoo or piercing to be found. In fact, Renee’s whole video catalog  seems to indicate domestic producers can find unmutilated performers. There seems to be sufficient animosity between the participants to add balanced spice. In other words, the one doing the domination seems intent on providing a most miserable experience for the loser.

The content is really neither a fight or wrestling match, though certainly elements of both are not just present but provide the structural framework. Its more of a dominant performance piece which can be boring and unsatisfying in less capable hands. Basically, Renee is just putting her opponent  through a miserable physical and emotional experience without really hurting or injuring her, before making her submit. At one point, just to give an example, Renee is sitting on her prone opponent in obvious contemplation of her next set of humiliating attacks. Almost languidly, with a smoothness that can only come from practice and total control, she slides her hips down onto the blonde’s crotch, grapevines the legs and applies a perfect breast smother. There are slaps and punches to the stomach, more meant to stun and humiliate than hurt. I normally hate this shit, but Renee just rocks these moves.

The content is similar to a DWW video featuring a wrestling match between the dominant Monika and the Meistermoaner of Prague, the extraordinary Pettula. Same level of animosity, aggression and dominance, and an awareness on the part of the viewer that you are witnessing one of the greatest-ever performers in erotic female  combat at their very best. What excellence Pettula brought to being dominated, with her otherworldly ability to moan in discomfort  (staccato, ascending, extended; all in perfect pitch) Renee brings to winning.

I have had some physical issues which preclude me from safely buying videos at the present time.When recovered, be assured I will be going after Catfight Haven videos with the thoroughness  and joie de vivre of Col. Hans Landa merrily pursuing the Chosen People through the pastoral French countryside.

Bottom line: I kind of liked it. Renee, you are an amazing performer and producer, and as a combination plate, so to speak, nonpareil. Lady, you have a fucking clue.

[JohnMoog]

Great post, ofecteau.  Don’t recognize the match you’re referring to, but I’ve seen many CFH vids.  Renee is very, very good at what she does, both as fighter and  producer.  She fights for real, as does everyone she employs (which is rare for a vidco).  I also find her plenty attractive, with a great look for our thing: the scrappy MILF next door whom I’d fantasize about as the victim, which, better still, she sometimes is. 

That said, I can’t remotely compare her to Tricia-Marty, Joan or Bruce, because their creative visions were so close to my own fantasy vision, while Renee’s is pretty far away.  To wit, she stresses pure catfighting (prior to the inevitable regular wrestling finish), meaning lots of things I just don’t find erotic.  I like hand to body and body to body contact; hand to hair and hand to clothes do nothing for me.  Then there’s all that profanity: they render the b word as meaningless as we did the f word in JHS.  Why be so trivially didactic?  If there’s nothing profound to say, let the action do the talking. 

Bottom line: in terms of effort, Renee leaves nothing on the table, in erotic terms, much too much.  If I sound hypercritical I guess I wouldn’t be so disappointed if I didn’t like her so much.  Much like the hottest scripted wrestlers, watching Renee in her genre only whets my appetite to see her in mine.

Get well soon, ofecteau.   

[ofecteau]

JohnMoog:

 
I’ve enjoyed your posts for some time now. You have suffered through mine for the same period.

Following this relatively lengthy interval, would you not say that our commonality of taste is roughly in the 90th percentile?

So I get EXACTLY what you are saying (or at least believe I can understand it to a 90% certainty). And I agree with every bit of data you provided to buttress your argument. And that is why I find the reaction I have had  so puzzling! We see the same thing, and have the same set of preconceptions going in, and yet our conclusions divurge while the foundations for them remain rock solid.

JohnMoog, I think when I pick up an unmistakably strong scent  of intelligence, I get confused. It throws a wrench into my otherwise rigid and narrow Mendoza Line for evaluating the attraction quotient of female fighting performers. Its what I described as the “Tina Fey Syndrome” finding its inevitable way into our shared interest. For example, whenever I see the beautiful and commercial-quality groomed Norah O’Donnell on MSNBC, I get happy and listen more intently, albeit distractedly because I find her so attractive. Mendoza Line standards come back into play when I see the equally smart but less hot Kelly O’Donnell. I think the “Tina Fey Syndrome” hits its zenith with 68 year old Cokie Roberts, long a fixture on the roundtable of ABC’s This Week. (Actually, it might hit its absolute with her partner on that show, George Will. He is so blindly brilliant and eloquent that when he talks baseball, of which he is a full-blown scholar, he certainly exposes as close to a sense of latent homoeroticism that this rigid hetero can ever feel). John, I fantasize of having dinner with Cokie, even holding her hand while she discusses the constitutional concept of state’s rights as it has applied to her home state of Mississippi over the past 200 years. Now, I am not completely nuts about the effect of intelligence; when Madeline Albright expounds on the latest Middle East peace initiative and its chances for success, the only stimulation I get is socio-political.

Bet you are glad that’s over.

I can’t remotely compare her to Tricia-Marty, Joan or Bruce, because their creative visions were so close to my own fantasy vision, while Renee’s is pretty far away.
   

JohnMoog, I would come to a different conclusion, that Renee is actually closer to those 3 than they are close to each other.(Also, by the way, I would include GR in this pantheon. The others, in terms of production quantity, are like quaint patisserie compared to the Hostess Co. that is DWW, but he keeps the quality at an astoundingly high level. Note I did not include Hana, though her videos are far and away my current favorites. FC is like the Miami Heat, a collection of impossibly flashy individuals who, while one might question their ability to mesh or even play good fundamental basketball, you dismiss these petty concerns and  just can’t take your eyes off them). CW, JW and Academy are really quite separate in terms of style. The set ups to the matches act as indicators and their themes dictate their action. At Academy, two women appear and, of all things, stretch in front of each other. This sets the stage for an animosity free but hopefully spirited and fairly pure wrestling match. Hair will not be pulled. If breasts are touched at all, they will be caressed as a function of humiliation and indication of control, not squeezed. Trash talk is minimal if present at all.

At JW, two women appear in the same room, but it is quickly apparent they have reasons, if contrived, for fighting beyond mere competition. They want at each other; competition be damned. Hair pulling? Absolutely! Breast and Sketch Artiste’s favorite, the crotch grab? Oh, hell yeah. Talking to each other to both establish a level of animosity and as a factor in humiliation? Inevitable.

At CW, great care is spent on establishing the cause of the fight. Time is spent nurturing a sense of mutual hate, which is the fuel for the anything goes sense of rage that is the CW trademark method of fighting.

My point is, at least as I see it through the narrow prism of my experience with CFH, as opposed to your far more extensive exposure, I think Renee  borrows from each of our Holy Trinity producers to the extent that her blend gives her more in common with each than the 3 have with each other.

Then there’s all that profanity: they render the b word as meaningless as we did the f word in JHS.  Why be so trivially didactic?  If there’s nothing profound to say, let the action do the talking. 

Verbiage during a good fight is certainly a slippery slope. Done wrong, almost nothing can fuck up a good match more. Look at the old Steel Kittens stuff when Hollywood’s never before or since matched body was the equivalent of the “talents” and flash of the afore-referenced LeBron James. The noises she made were so off-putting that I would have to use multiple towels to wipe the considerable amounts of my own spit off the screen following watching her. Santana would have been a much more satisfying performer had she been a mute. But lets look again at our Holy Trinity. At CW, don’t you think that, say, Chandra or LaDonna snarling threats to their opponents added positive spice to the videos? At Academy, I loved it when Hannah would taunt an overmatched opponent (“I,’m gonna make you my girlfriend.” I am convinced that is where Mike Tyson appropriated that famous phrase prior to employing it against Razor Ruddock.) And at JW, couldn’t Alecia and Simone make even the trite “fucking bitch” come to life and sing?

Now, in a really perfect match that would combine my own passions, the trash talk and taunting would not be “trivially didactic.” Hannah would gain complete and total control of an opponent and taunt her with something like, “ I’m gonna fuck you up worse that Longshanks did William Wallace.” Alecia would sit on her foe’s face and say,”I am gonna grind you down harder than Mugabe did the Zimbabwe economy..” And finally, how about an ultimate and culturally relevant taunt from Simone: “I am gonna throw you in a bathtub, murder you more violently than than Charlotte Corday did Jean-Paul Marat, then sell the tub to the highest bidder, YOU FUCKING BITCH!!!!”

I think you’d have to pay a lot extra for that.

[catfightreport]

90th percentile?

I would say no.   Most of the people in this industry rarely comment, or give feedback of any type whatsoever, and scripted matches I link to on my website far outweigh the sales of real wrestling and/or catfighting.

I prefer the real stuff as well, but sometimes I'm left scratching my head.   However, to each their own, and that is how it should be.

[ofecteau]

Catfightreport:

My disinterest in quantifying the numerical extent to which my own tastes in female fighting  dovetails with the remainder of the video buying public is exceeded only by my far reaching ignorance on the subject. Any degree of elemental reading skill and comprehension would clearly indicate to any reader, as would my directly addressing  my remarks to Mr. JohnMoog, that I was remarking on the striking similarity of strictly the aesthetic and stimulating properties of the content both he and I enjoy and our again similar approaches to purchasing said content. My assessment of our similar tastes, again, those of only Mr. Moog and myself and no one else, was based on months of reading and responding to each other’s posts, and the insight thereby acquired.

Perhaps your ability to read and clearly understand and retain that information has been compromised by your years of combing through the National Enquirer and other such periodicals for any mention of something like an incident involving Lindsay Lohan not getting extra pickles on her Whopper at a Brentwood Burger King and making a snide remark to the counter girl, causing you to drop everything and completely retool your latest edition of The Catfightreport to breathlessly report this earth-shattering news to your hungry readership and to devote the rest of the edition to speculate on just how far this might have gone had not Miss Lohan’s cell phone rang and distracted her.

 Sorry, Catfightreport, you just trigger something in me that I seem to have no control over. Hope things are going well for you and that 2011 is the year Catfightreport goes mainstream and leads the way to a brighter  future for all of us enthusiasts.

And it could have been worse. Bunk might have seen this first.

All the best, my friend. Be safe..  

[ofecteau]

I apologize again for the outburst, Catfightreport. Your efforts deserve more positive support than my small soul was able to muster.

But, man! So many times your blog has such a cheap, trivial feel to it when you could do sooooo much more! Its reads as though there is a world in which serial nonsense poster Fightfanatic has been credentialed and turned loose on the White House Press Corp. Could you imagine him at a Presidential news conference?

“Good afternoon, President Obama. I am Fightfanatic representing The Catfightreport. I have a multi part question. At last night’s State Dinner honoring the German Chancellor, your wife was wearing a fushia gown, while Chancellor Merkel was dressed in a lavender pant suit whose color bore more than a little resemblance. First, did you feel at any time that Mrs. Obama was about to confront Ms. Merkel regarding her wardrobe choice and take affront to its small similarity to her own? Second, did you feel this to be an active provocation on the part of Chancellor Merkel towards the First Lady, especially considering it took place not just on sovereign American soil, but in your very family home, the White House? Third, if Michelle had confronted the Chancellor, do you think it would have led to a catfight? Fourth, had it led to a fight, who do you think would have won? Fifth, I am curious, as the nation’s Chief Executive,could you provide speculative details on how you would imagine it would go down? And lastly, I don’t think its important, but my editor insists I ask, do you think German-American relations might be negatively impacted by the fight? Just curious”

Catfightreport, you and your blog have so much more to offer, and you yourself are capable of delivering .

[fightfanatic]

I apologize again for the outburst, Catfightreport. Your efforts deserve more positive support than my small soul was able to muster.

But, man! So many times your blog has such a cheap, trivial feel to it when you could do sooooo much more! Its reads as though there is a world in which serial nonsense poster Fightfanatic has been credentialed and turned loose on the White House Press Corp. Could you imagine him at a Presidential news conference?

“Good afternoon, President Obama. I am Fightfanatic representing The Catfightreport. I have a multi part question. At last night’s State Dinner honoring the German Chancellor, your wife was wearing a fushia gown, while Chancellor Merkel was dressed in a lavender pant suit whose color bore more than a little resemblance. First, did you feel at any time that Mrs. Obama was about to confront Ms. Merkel regarding her wardrobe choice and take affront to its small similarity to her own? Second, did you feel this to be an active provocation on the part of Chancellor Merkel towards the First Lady, especially considering it took place not just on sovereign American soil, but in your very family home, the White House? Third, if Michelle had confronted the Chancellor, do you think it would have led to a catfight? Fourth, had it led to a fight, who do you think would have won? Fifth, I am curious, as the nation’s Chief Executive,could you provide speculative details on how you would imagine it would go down? And lastly, I don’t think its important, but my editor insists I ask, do you think German-American relations might be negatively impacted by the fight? Just curious”

Catfightreport, you and your blog have so much more to offer, and you yourself are capable of delivering .

Ok was that really called for? Seriously?

[JohnMoog]

Following this relatively lengthy interval, would you not say that our commonality of taste is roughly in the 90th percentile?

At least.  And we can now add Norah O’Donnell and catfightreport to the items on which we agree.

JohnMoog, I would come to a different conclusion, that Renee is actually closer to those 3 than they are close to each other.(Also, by the way, I would include GR in this pantheon.

Interesting.  I had included CW, Academy and JW and excluded DWW on purpose.  As I see it, each of the former troika places a very strong producer imprint on everything they do.  As you note, it varies, but it’s always some combination of lesbian attraction, and humiliation, differing only in the precise mix.  Since those are my two buttons, and since I can appreciate them in different degrees, they all work for me.  I see DWW differently.  They don’t have such an imprint, beyond transparency, I guess.  They just take the hottest girls they can find and let them go at it as hard as they can.  If I like the girls, and if the matchup is especially appealing to me, it works.  But the two erotic triggers are implicit, if there at all.  Further, when DWW does try to imprint things, it fails.  Take their recent experiment with the facesit ending, which I find an artificial add-on, not the necessary and inevitable götterdämmerung as in JW.

Time is spent nurturing a sense of mutual hate, which is the fuel for the anything goes sense of rage that is the CW trademark method of fighting.

Aha. My favorite CW, or one of them, is the Wrestling Lesson, which isn't about hate for me, at least not at first.  Something more subtle is going on, something closer to real life, or so I imagine.

I loved it when Hannah would taunt an overmatched opponent (“I,’m gonna make you my girlfriend.”

I don’t recall that, but it’s brilliant.  What I like is the extra humiliation for the victim in knowing that Hannah’s having such an easy time beating her physically that she can think up witty comments at her expense at the same time.  

And at JW, couldn’t Alecia and Simone make even the trite “fucking bitch” come to life and sing?

Like OJ’s glove, it must fit.  In the Special Gift and in the club challenges with Amber, the dialogue reflects what's actually going on physically.  OTOH, take the very hot Bathing Suit.  What’s erotic for me is that ever aggressive, always smiling Kim keeps coming at Lorraina, and keeps coming up short, until she has to pay a steep price for the mistake of challenging a tough black girl. But WTF does bickering like idiots over clothing have to do with that?  Great integral dialogue is in ACA 154, when the humiliated Shayna sheepishly says to dominant Dani, “I was supposed to be kicking your ass.” That beats women mindlessly cursing because they think that’s what guys want to hear.

[ofecteau]

  And we can now add Norah O’Donnell and catfightreport to the items on which we agree.

Time is spent nurturing a sense of mutual hate, which is the fuel for the anything goes sense of rage that is the CW trademark method of fighting.

Aha. My favorite CW, or one of them, is the Wrestling Lesson, which isn't about hate for me, at least not at first.  Something more subtle is going on, something closer to real life, or so I imagine.

These two brief (God, I wish I had your gift for brevity!) passages from your wonderful post make me realize the extent to which I am honored to be conversing with a man who is so clearly my intellectual superior. First, with surgical precision in a single strike, you behead my argument more artfully and powerfully than Miyamoto Musashi. I thought it was watertight. But like a Cray mainframe, you instantly zoned in on the one match in the CW catalog that undoes me. “The Wrestling Lesson.” One of my favorites also; the best thing ever, with respect to our tastes,  from Tanya Danielle. Sure enough, it starts out with a theme of mutual ANNOYANCE,  only builds much later, and never does get anywhere near hatred. I have no comeback. Point, Moog.

The second passage, upon reflection,  makes me think of the similarities between yourself and James T. Kirk. To recognize the hotness of Norah O’Donnell takes nothing special. However, your short but thorough dismissal of Catfightreport was simply elegant .

Indulge me in a game, JohnMoog. This came to me just a while ago in a narco-induced dream during one of my frequent naps. I had recently watched Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan on Blu-Ray, and the Kobayashi Maru must have bored into my subconscious.

Imagine you awake to find yourself marooned on an island with no hope of rescue or escape. The island is lush, and laden with fruits and vegetables. The reefs are bulging with fresh seafood, which you can easily catch in the net you have been provided with, and deliciously cook with the utensils and frying pan also at your disposal. Although you also have a shotgun with ONLY one cartridge, you quickly realize you have no natural enemies, that you are the apex predator. Hell, the only carnivore. For entertainment, you have a solar powered 52” Samsung LN52C530 flat screen, a solar powered Samsung BD-C6800 Blu-ray Disc player, and, the complete catalogs of DWW, FC, Joan Wise and Academy  properly formatted. You look out to the reef, and begin to weep. As a surfer, you see breaking before you a right hand wave that you instantly recognize as Jeffrey’s Bay, and a left that you see as Cannon’s on Kauai. At your feet is a pair of BZ Rubbers Body Board Fins (boards break, you have no repair material). You are fucking set, my friend, for the life you have dreamed about since childhood.

Now, here is where the Kobayashi Maru comes into play. As a thinking man, you need intellectual stimulation. You need some stimulation, the kind of which can only be provided by human interaction  , by having someone to talk with, to share this bounty and Great Fortune with.  As your interests are history and the socio-political world at large, with a minor in female combat, you need people considered to be experts in these fields. You look to your left, and walking up the beach towards you, are Anne Coulter and Catfightreport.

This is why you are unquestionably smarter than I am, JohnMoog. I would panic, curse God and His cruel trick He had played on me, instantly understand the presence of the firearm and its single shell and be dead from a self-inflicted shotgun blast to the head before they got within 100 yards. You, Capt. Kirk-like as you are, wound change the very parameters of the puzzle itself. You would grin and bear it, wait until they were asleep, and then hit them over the head with your skillet.

Enjoy  life, JohnMoog, and be safe.

[JohnMoog]

You would grin and bear it, wait until they were asleep, and then hit them over the head with your skillet until each was dead.

In light of recent events, I'm loath to be graphic.  Suffice it to say, if in hell Anne Coulter isn't completely submerged in boiling excrement, it'll be because she's standing on catfightreport's shoulders.

[ofecteau]

Interesting.  I had included CW, Academy and JW and excluded DWW on purpose.  As I see it, each of the former troika places a very strong producer imprint on everything they do.  As you note, it varies, but it’s always some combination of lesbian attraction, and humiliation, differing only in the precise mix.  Since those are my two buttons, and since I can appreciate them in different degrees, they all work for me.  I see DWW differently.  They don’t have such an imprint, beyond transparency, I guess.  They just take the hottest girls they can find and let them go at it as hard as they can.  If I like the girls, and if the matchup is especially appealing to me, it works.  But the two erotic triggers are implicit, if there at all.

As you gently but plainly cut the balls off my CW argument by referencing “The Wrestling Lesson,” let me respond to this by simply reminding you of our shared appreciation for Mary-Ann and specifically DWW-810, vs. Eva N. Otherwise, your point is solid.

I don’t recall that, but it’s brilliant.  What I like is the extra humiliation for the victim in knowing that Hannah’s having such an easy time beating her physically that she can think up witty comments at her expense at the same time.

John, Soap-36, vs. Rubye. Hannah has coaxed the penultimate submission before the end of the match, defined as the appearance of the synthetic penis. She positions Rubye into a tit-to-tit full body pin, her face inches from her opponent’s, grins contentedly and delivers the line.

This forced girlfriend concept , if not a reprise of the exact reading of the taunt, is  also referenced to the point of becoming a motif in ACA-86, vs. Sadie.

Unlike the late, unlamented and totally unoriginal Tomcatfightstories, I can remember what I have written previously. Your post recalls something in this forum’s past.

vast numbers of guys fantasize about fucking their mothers or have actually done so and why not?

I am neither a psychologist nor a geneticist or man of the cloth, so I can only list the first several thousand reasons why you shouldn't fuck your mother!.

My own vision of hell is a vast pool of molten excrement, with the heads (just the heads) of child molesters bobbing to and fro. Why can you see their heads? They are standing on the shoulders of guys who fucked their mothers!

.

I am truly honored.

[waslick]

I'm firmly in the RENEE fan corner....her work is a standard others should strive for.  Her titfight videos (SHYRENEE) are amazing.  The one snippit she had of her vs Paige is a real awesome item...unfortunately it never got published other than the previews.......great stuff