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Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)

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Offline meow157

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Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« on: December 14, 2011, 08:19:37 AM »
Hi everyone. Im new here and to writing stories but this is my first one. its only just a beginning but let me know what you think and if its any good ill finish it.

Erin was 18. She had just graduated high school and was looking forward to getting out of her washed up hometown and moving away to college. Erin was about 5’8 with shoulder length dark brown hair. Erin was going to check out her new dorm room and see it for the first time. She would be meeting her roommate for the first time. Erin arrived at the dorms and went to her room. She was pleased to see that it was quite spacious and wouldn’t cramp her and her roommate. It appeared that her roommate had been here awhile since she was already moving her things in.
   Erin tapped the girl on the shoulder. “Excuse me, hi I’m your new roommate.” The girl turned and looked at Erin. Her jaw dropped. The much shorter blonde was no stranger. Her name was Lauren. Much shorter than Erin she was about 5’2 and had blonde hair just above her shoulders. Laurens hair was up in a messy bun and she had jeans and a tank top on which showed her small boobs of well. She also had a bandanna tied on her head. Erin had her hair down and was wearing a button down shirt which barely managed to contain her rather large tits and yoga pants. “Wow, of all the people I get to room with, it turns out to be you” said Lauren. Erin’s high school sweetheart had cheated on Erin with Lauren and they had one or two heated arguments but had never come close to fighting. The tension was immense between the young women as they glared at one another hatefully.” Ya know Erin,” said Lauren “Zack wasn’t really your type and it was a complete accident. There’s no reason for us to be at each other’s throats all semester over a boy. Let’s try and be civil since we are going to be stuck here together.” “Accident huh? So you mean to tell me that you accidentally had sex with him 3 times while we were together?” Erin snarled. Lauren who wasn’t too happy about being called out on this got right in Erin’s face. “Look if you’re going to be a complete and total bitch to me and were going to be stuck together let’s just settle this right now while we are alone Erin.” Erin laughed. “Hahaha you wanna settle it Lauren? After you ruined my relationship and after you continued to sleep with him? Now you wanna settle it?” What the matter Erin? Afraid I might kick your ass?” Both girls stood face to face hands on their hips waiting for the other to make an attempt to strike first. “You want a catfight you stupid home wrecking whore, you got it!” Erin grabbed ahold of Lauren’s bun and started to jerk her head back as Lauren reached out and grabbed a handful of Erin’s dark locks. Both girls now knew it was time to settle this….
In the land of the blind, the man with one eye is king.

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Offline meow157

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #1 on: December 14, 2011, 05:36:36 PM »
Any feedback positive or negative is welcomed. Do you guys want me to finish? Anything I should add?
In the land of the blind, the man with one eye is king.

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Offline yotamba

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #2 on: December 15, 2011, 01:09:04 AM »
great start, pls continue... i hope it will be an aggresive fight:)

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Offline meow157

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #3 on: December 15, 2011, 03:54:22 AM »
   Both girls were in a heated hair pulling contest at this point. Erin had Laurens bun in a tight grasp and was trying hard to get it undone. Lauren had a big handful of Erin’s beautiful dark hair and was yanking it hard. Both girls were yelping and screaming as they both were doing their best. “Let go of my fucking hair you bitch!” Lauren said as Erin gave her tied back blonde mane a hard yank. “No way you stupid cxnt. This is payback for sleeping with my boy!” Erin tripped over Laurens feet and both girls fell to the floor, both still with a death grip on the others hair. Lauren climbed ontop of Erin and proceeded to bitch slap her several times. Erin then delivered a swift punch to Laurens stomach. “Uggghhhhhh!” screamed Lauren as she doubled over in pain releasing her grip on her opponents’ hair and falling off of her. Erin got to her feet and reached down grabbing ahold of Laurens bun again, which was now practically almost totally undone. She yanked her hair hard until it was completely loose, and ripped her bandanna off as well. “Come on hun, what happened to kicking my ass? Not as tough as you thought huh?”Before Erin had another opportunity to say anything Lauren rolled onto her back and kicked Erin hard in the leg sending her backwards. Lauren hurried to her feet and tackled Erin into a dresser. The two girls began having a full on struggle. Both of them were trying to kick, slap, claw, whatever it took to get an advantage. Lauren went for Erin’s hair grabbing two big handfuls of her dark locks and started pulling hard. Erin grabbed Laurens wrists to try and pull her hands out of her hair but she was finding this to be unsuccessful at best. “Lauren let go NOW!!” she screamed. Lauren smiled and replied “make me you cocky bitch!” Erin decided if Lauren wasn’t going to let her hair go she would give it right back to her. She latched on with both hands to her messy blonde hair and started pulling wildly. The two were giving it everything they had. As they danced around the room they both were screaming obscenities at one another and trying to get the other to release their hold.
Erin managed to drag Lauren to the bed that was in the room and threw her onto it. Since neither girl was showing any signs of letting hair go Erin fell directly ontop of Lauren. The two laid there, Erin straddling Lauren, Trying to catch their breath. Both girls were sweaty and Erin’s shirt had popped a few buttons revealing her sexy red bra. “You done now?” Erin asked. “Fuck you Erin.” Spatted Lauren. The two then tightened their holds and began grunting and yelling as they continued their little contest. They rolled off the the bed hitting the floor. Erin quickly rolled ontop of her opponent but Lauren wasn’t giving up that easy. Both girls rolled around trying to rip each other’s hair out for a few more minutes. Finally Lauren released her hold on Erin’s hair after close to tem minutes of brutal hair pulling. Erin pulled Lauren to her feet by the hair and proceeded to slap her multiple times. Lauren didn’t even try to fight back. She knew that the fight was going nowhere fast. “Stop, let go of my hair Erin I’m done ok! Just stop!” Erin planted one good hard punch to her jaw and let her hair go. Lauren wiped the little bit of blood coming from her now busted lip away. Erin was facing the door as she saw a much unexpected sight. There was her ex, Zack. He walked in and looked at the two of them.  What in the world happened?” Lauren looked at him, “What does it looked like? Things got tense and she came at me. We just had to get it all out and get it over with.” Erin stormed out of the room. As she reached the door of the dorm buildings office to get a room transfer form, her phone went off. It was a text from Lauren. “This isn’t over yet. Next time I see you I’m going to make sure I kick your ass.”
In the land of the blind, the man with one eye is king.

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Offline Odin

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #4 on: December 18, 2011, 04:12:42 AM »
This is the start of a great story, looking forward to reading more.

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Offline rawhide

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #5 on: December 20, 2011, 02:46:06 PM »
I like the beginning, with two former high-school rival's discovering they've become college roommates.  The desire on both girls part to pull each other's hair is also very realistic.  Since they did not have the opportunity to finish their hair-pulling match, I hope you will favor us with more of Erin and Lauren's story.

When  I was a boy, I witnessed an IRL hair-contest between two long-haired moms in my neighborhood.  Given your storyline, here's the link in case you would like to read it.

http://www.freecatfights.com/forums/index.php/topic,4431.0.html

I look forward to the next installment of Erin and Lauren's hair-pulling feud.
Rawhide

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Offline Odin

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #6 on: December 25, 2011, 03:54:59 AM »
Would really like another installment of this......

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Offline Odin

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #7 on: June 07, 2012, 08:14:43 PM »
Was there ever a part 2 to this?
Great story

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Offline JT Edson

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #8 on: October 26, 2012, 01:00:45 PM »
Nice. I loved it. I can hardly wiat to go back now and read their second encounter!

JT Edson

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Offline herboyfriend

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #9 on: December 20, 2012, 08:00:12 PM »
I like this beginning, the story could evolve into something quite erotic, too -?
Every excess is fine as long as you don't overdo it.

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Offline JT Edson

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Re: Hair Pulling Dorm Fight (my first story)
« Reply #10 on: December 22, 2012, 01:23:01 PM »
Any feedback positive or negative is welcomed. Do you guys want me to finish? Anything I should add?
Great story. I like the scenario and I have always loved hairpulling catfights.