Box Office Blockbuster Battle: Blonde vs. Blonde at the Movies
When Lisa April Teeman moved to the small town of Millhart at the start of her senior year, the students at her new high school didn’t know what to make of her. Lisa’s dazzling blue eyes, bright smile, light blond, shoulder-length hair, and perfect body could have made other girls jealous, but no one had ever met such a sweet girl. Lisa was nice to everyone, whether they deserved it or not. She refused numerous advances from handsome young men from wealthy families, fearing she might unintentionally steal away another girl’s boyfriend or dream. She wore conservative clothing that hid her amazing figure. Lisa downplayed her own beauty, but she took every opportunity to complement other girls on theirs. In time, almost everyone grew to love her.
One notable holdout remained. Blond beauty Christina Francis Cherrymoore didn’t like the new girl. Unlike the sweet, pure image Lisa tried hard to project, Christina oozed sex appeal. Every young man in the area dreamed of having her. Some girls whispered that she had obliged about half of them. Christina knew what was said about her. She had grown up with pretty little divas who said nice things to her face only to cut her to pieces with vicious gossip the moment her back was turned. Although Christina had to repeat several grades, she had the kind of intellect born on the streets. When Christina looked at the new girl, she didn’t see an angel. She saw a poser and smelled a fake.
Christina saw Lisa as a potential rival. Christina had won the title of queen of the halls through many hard-fought battles over the years. She wasn’t about to give up her crown to the new girl. Only a few months after Lisa’s arrival, the local bad girl decided to take the new good girl on. As Lisa walked through a long hallway connecting two wings of their school, Christina tripped her. Lisa executed a painful and embarrassing belly flop on the floor. Lisa leapt up. The two blondes stood toe to toe. The girls glared into each other’s eyes, exchanging sneers. A crowd gathered. Christina shoved Lisa. Looking around at the faces of her new friends, Lisa breathed heavily. A fight seemed imminent, until Lisa shrank back, submissively.
Christina pinched her fingers around Lisa’s chin, her brown eyes stabbing into Lisa’s frightened blue ones. “This is my town,” Christina said. “If you stick your face in my business, I’ll step on it. I’ll crush you like the insect you are! Do you understand me?”
Hyperventilating, Lisa nodded.
Christina tossed her very long, dark-blond hair over her shoulder and walked away. Fighting tears, Lisa pulled herself together. Several popular girls rushed to help, telling her, ‘Good girls don’t catfight. Tramps like Christina do.’
The students at Lisa’s school couldn’t have guessed the irony of the situation. The girls at Lisa’s school told her that Christina ruled the town by being a brawling, wild, rebellious slut. Ironically, Lisa had been practically run out of her own hometown for acting in much the same way Christina did!
Christina was partially right. Lisa was a fraud. Far from the sweet, pure image she worked so very hard to project, Lisa had been the wildest girl in her old hometown. Lisa had a list of male admirers that rivaled Christina’s. Like Christina, Lisa had been held back several times, making her a few years older than her classmates. Lisa had been in far fewer fights than Christina, but she wasn’t afraid to mix it up. She had backed down from Christina due to fear, but Christina was not the source of that fear.
Christina had always been a bad girl by choice. Lisa’s choices had been made for her. Lisa grew up desperately seeking love from an impossible, demanding mother and an abusive father.
Both parents treated her terribly. After they divorced, Lisa’s mother blamed her for the split. Her mother blamed her for everything. Lisa had to grow tough and rebellious, to survive her mother’s constant assaults. Lisa’s mother began a relationship with a man Lisa was forced to call ‘Uncle Dud.’ Lisa’s scheming, nefarious ‘uncle’ introduced her to the drugs she became addicted to and tried to force her into prostitution. When she refused, her mother practically threw her out. Alone and vulnerable, Lisa sought refuge wherever she could find it. The hurting young girl fell for lines from dangerous young men who fed her addiction. They, in turn, fed on her. Eventually, Lisa’s mother and ‘uncle’ were arrested for their crimes. With her birth father also in prison, she was sent to rehab, and then to various state homes. She was eventually forced on an aunt and uncle who only saw her as a burden.
Still denied the love she desperately craved, Lisa arrived in her new hometown on a mission. She no longer felt worthy of true love, but she was determined to make friends. Certain no one would accept her if they knew of her past, Lisa worked to create a new, angelic, good girl persona. She lied about her past. All she wanted was a chance to earn friendship. She spent the first few weeks at her new school living in fear, terrified her secret would be revealed. As weeks passed, she began to feel safe. Then Christina challenged her to a fight. The bad girl deep inside her wanted to stand and fight, but a tiny voice rang in her mind, warning her ‘Good girls don’t catfight.’ Afraid that showing her true colors might blow her cover, Lisa backed down.
The year passed. Lisa graduated. She had made good friends and had built a good life. Unfortunately, she seemed destined to cross swords with Christina Cherrymoore.
That summer, Christina entered a local beauty pageant. She should have won the previous year, but the pretty girls who spread ugly gossip struck. They began a whispering campaign. When the judges heard the rumors, they refused to let their town be represented by a woman of ‘low moral standing’. Christina took second place. The year after she finally graduated was the last year of her eligibility. She was determined to win.
The gossiping girls hated Christina, and wanted to deprive her of victory. They practically forced Lisa to enter the pageant, implying she wouldn’t be a ‘real friend’ if she refused to represent their clique. She reluctantly entered, unaware her so-called friends were putting her on a collision course with Christina.
The two 21 year olds were among the final three contestants. Determined to win, Christina wore an almost non-existent silver bikini for the swimsuit competition and performed her best PG-13 version of a famous Sharon Stone film scene, hoping to seduce the judges. Although Lisa’s baby-blue bikini was far less daring, her beauty was remarkable, even heavenly.
By the time of the last event, Lisa and Christina were tied. The judges asked each remaining girl, ‘Why do you want to be crowned Miss Millhart?’ The first girl gave an adequate but unimpressive reply. Christina gave an overly rehearsed speech filled with thoughts on world peace and happiness so overblown it brought snickers from the audience.
Lisa took the microphone. She knew there were out-of-towners in the crowd. Terrified someone might recognize her and reveal her past, she quaked, visibly. Her voice trembled. “I only want a fair chance. All I want is the chance to be as good a girl as I can be. I want to repay this town for accepting me. Your friendship means more to me than you’ll ever know.”
On the verge of tears, Lisa hurried off the stage. Someone clapped. Others joined in.
In the end, Lisa won the pageant. Christina took third. Christina’s blood boiled. She took the loss as a personal insult. She vowed that she would destroy Lisa Teeman, at any cost!
Most of the graduating class left for college that fall, but Lisa’s grades and financial situation kept her from following them. She remained in town. She took a job at an old-style movie theater downtown. Lisa felt content. The underclassmen she had attended school with patronized the theater. They adored her. She knew Christina had also remained in town, but she never saw her. Lisa hoped Christina had forgotten about her.
Lisa’s hopes ended on the night of the high school’s homecoming game. Immediately after the game, most of the student body squeezed into the theater to see a midnight show. Because the homecoming festivities also served as the first reunion for the class who graduated the previous year, most of Lisa’s old friends and classmates were there, too.
Lisa had a wonderful time, until Christina Cherrymoore entered the theater, her would-be biker boyfriend in tow. Lisa’s boss had left her in charge of the theater. He wouldn’t return until the show was almost over. She felt trapped.
All eyes locked on Christina, as she took her place in line to the candy counter. Christina wore pumps, very high, tight, glistening golden shorts, and a black sports bra half-hidden beneath her boyfriend’s leather jacket. Behind the glass candy counter, Lisa waited, nervously. She wore her theater uniform, made up of a black blazer over a bright red blouse, black slacks, black Loafers, and matching black socks. The movie had started, but whispers spread through the patrons still in the lobby awaiting refreshments. Everyone knew Christina had come to face Lisa in a final showdown!
When Christina reached the refreshment stand, she ordered a large soft drink. Lisa poured it and sat it on the top of the counter. Christina then ordered Lisa to get her a particular candy bar from far back at the bottom of the clear glass candy counter. When Lisa crouched low on her knees, Christina used her elbow to knock her drink over the far side, making it splash over Lisa’s head.
Lisa shrieked. The crowd roared with laughter. Lisa leapt up snarling, fists clenched, but she held her temper. She had worked so long and hard to create her image. Afraid to lose the friends she had sacrificed so much for, Lisa played the part of the good girl and backed down. She remembered what she’d been told. ‘Good girls don’t catfight.’
With a smug smile, Christina said, “Betcha wonder where I’ve been, huh? I’ve been taking trips to your old hometown! I’ve been asking questions. I know your secret, Bitch!”
Lisa’s eyes bulged and the color left her face. She whimpered, “Please…don’t….”
Christina pinched her fingers around Lisa’s chin and said, “I told you that if you stuck your face in my business, I’d step on it. I promised to crush you. I keep my word. I’m going to tell everyone your secret!”
Lisa fought tears. Voice trembling, she whispered, “You don’t know what I’ve been through! Please, don’t do this to me! I’ll leave town. I’ll do anything! Please, let me keep my friends and my reputation!”
Lisa bolted for the door. Christina caught her by her sleeve, yanking off her blazer and sending her spinning to her hips on the lobby floor. The crowd cheered.
Christina stood triumphantly over Lisa and announced, “I’ve been to Lisa’s old hometown. She made fools of you! Your little goody-two-shoes was a hooker before she came here!”
Lisa cried, “That’s a lie!”
“She hooked up with anyone who would feed her addiction, “Christina said. “Oh, yeah, she was a drug addict, too! You all thought she was an angel. Ha! She was the town whore!”
Gasps erupted, followed by evil whispers.
Lisa’s world shattered, like an eggshell hitting the floor. Tears welling in her blue eyes, she looked up and sobbed, “I was just a kid! It wasn’t my fault! I tried so hard. When I came here, I just wanted to earn your friendship. I knew you wouldn’t accept me if you knew my past. I just wanted a chance. Is that too much to ask?”
Lisa saw her words fell on deaf ears. In the eyes of her former friends, she was no longer worthy. Now the vicious gossip would be about her. The good girl she had tried so hard to become was gone, crushed under Christina’s foot. The bad girl she had fought to suppress was all that remained. A long-caged wildcat broke loose.
“Bitch!” Lisa kicked Christina down.
Both blondes rose. Lisa shook with fury, teeth bared. Christina had a smug, closed-lipped smile, as she kicked off her pumps and slid the jacket off her shoulders. “Oh, Bitch,” she growled, “I’ve been waiting for this!” The blondes circled. Lisa’s face froze in quite possibly the sexiest sneer ever. She leapt forward, directly into a jab to her eye. The crowd roared. Lisa almost fell. Christina charged, but a well-placed punch to Christina’s mouth dazed her. Her long, dark-blond hair whipped, as she fell back against the candy counter. Now scowling, Christina caught Lisa on her way in. The girls spun in circles, clawing, hitting, and pulling hair. Lisa prevailed. She slammed Christina onto the top of the counter and crawled on top her. Lisa tried to choke her hated enemy, but Christina had tight hold of Lisa’s wrists. Unable to bring her hands down on her enemy, Lisa reached sideways and grabbed a large, juicy pickle. She squeezed juice into Christina’s face. The instant Christina instinctively shut her eyes, Lisa shoved the pickle down Christina’s gaping, wet mouth, choking her.
Lisa sneered. “I hear you have lots of experience with something similar.”
The crowd went wild. Humiliated, Christina’s plump bare feet pounded on the glass countertop until it threatened to break.
In serious danger of being choked out or surrendering, Christina reached out with desperately flailing hands for anything she could use as a weapon. Her fingers curled around an old-style light bulb used in the old-fashioned theater sign. A low-pitched crunching sound filled the lobby, as Christina broke the large bulb against Lisa’s head. Lisa’s wide eyes went blank. She slumped. Christina rolled on top. She reached down and yanked open Lisa’s red blouse, exposing her pink bra. Buttons flew. Christina then poured very hot, melted nacho cheese on Lisa’s breasts. Lisa screamed in shock, pain, and shame. She kicked so hard both her shoes went flying. Christina slung Lisa off the counter by her blouse, tearing it completely off.
Lisa rose, panting, arms crossed over her chest. Christina circled her. The crowd egged them on, knowing that the good girl and the bad girl were in a fight to the finish!
--Concluded in Part 2--
