Alumni, Parents, Friends of the School:
I know we were all expecting that surely by December 2021, we would be able to resume our Annual Feast of St John Fundraiser with a full card of three real catfights between six courageous volunteer mom's from our school community. And in an in-person setting with our alumni from past classes reuniting to cheer on the gradiatrices.
As we all know, the Omicron variant of Covid-19 had other ideas, and for the second consecutive year, we needed to fall back on alternative arrangements.
Fortunately, this school has dedicated friends in high and distinguished places, always will to step up and meet our students' needs.
And 2 Chicago-area friends, our Christmas angels, stepped forward this afternoon in a taped event, available now for download from pledging donors.
Jenny McCarthy and Carmen Electra engaged in a topless catfight for the viewing pleasure and excitement of our qualifying alumni and extended community. All proceeds benefit our school students and the capital needs of our facility.
Jenny is of course much taller than Carmen, and is moreover a trained black belt. However, in order to guarantee the entertainment value of the final production, the 1992 Playmate of the Year agreed to use only catfighting tactics, and to stay on the ground, against the Chicago Bulls' Dennis Rodman's former gitlfriend.
The fight between the two women lasted twenty minutes from bell to submission, and we think you'll agree that the star power of yhe performers more than offsets the lost intensity from a second consecutive year of angry class moms not facing off.
May this be the last year of pandemic interruption to our grand tradition.
St John,
pray for us
