Over 15 years ago now the legendary Barb coined the phrase " recreational wrestling" to describe the underground women's wrestling scene and Voice Verified can trace its origins back to he website even today.
I am not knocking VV as I am not a member ( obviously) but I would also really recommend that any serious woman recreational wrestler joins
www.meetfighters.com.
Its mainly a guys site but females are actually very welcome. Its all incognito and you don't have to put up a pic if you don't want to, nor include your face in any pics.
It works on a recommendation basis and the vast majority of members really do wrestle via it.
There is a large male gay contingent but everybody respects each others limits in my experience and that also hopefully reduces the silly male pestering issues.
Like I say I am not knocking VV but the great thing about Meetfighters is that a large amount of technology and data storage is already in existence and your match records etc are availalble for browsing, if you wan,t to find new opponents on line quickly. To post a match both parties have to verify it took place which gets rid of all the BS.
Also it contains info on matrooms for some big cities where female as well as male wrestlers are welcome. To my mind meeting an opponent at a neutral matroom makes for much safer and focused situation etc.
Anyway its works for about 10,000 guys worldwide so it could work for you