I love this story - I find it incredibly sexy, but I'm curious, because I don't remember there being so many missing words, spelling mistakes and sloppy language when it was first posted. Wonderful work creating the story, but you might want to read through it again and clean up the writing.
You're completely right, and that's why I didn't used a corrector before posting it, my bad, I thought that the text was already corrected. But nope. The thing is I can't modify now, can I? I'm trying to do so anyway.
Thanks for the feed back!
TO BE A QUEEN [...]
She left him badly. In the middle of one of their wild sorority parties, Naomi, the tit queen of the sorority, just saw as her boyfriend, Daniel, an exchange student from Spain, was heavily defeated by her ex-boyfriend, Paul. The American stud just destroyed him in a cockfight in front of the sorority. He raised his arms, and Naomi just jumped onto him, rubbing against his cock with hunger. She looked back at Daniel, who was still lying on the floor, defeated, and she said:
-Sorry, but I just deserve the best of the best. And she continued caressing the victorious guy. A couple of weeks after that, Daniel went back to Spain, humiliated, unable to keep going to that New England University after what happened. Naomi and Paul got stuck together again in a relationship based on how hot they found each other. A relationship that consists of pure, raw competition. They both have to be the best in order to be worthy of their counterparts.
Naomi was, indeed, a masterpiece of a woman. She was, in fact, declared the tit queen of the sorority. She was an outstanding redhead with blue eyes, a beautiful smile with full lips, and a impressive asset of 36DD breasts. She always felt at the top of the hill in prettiness and in breast power. She had defeated a lot of girls in titfights in order to maintain her status as the tit queen, ruining egos and self-esteem here and there with ease. Her breasts were firm, full, with hard, perky nipples crowning them. They were untameable.
Someday, she was walking by the campus and heard a bunch of guys speaking: "Did you see her tits? They were amazing! " "They're probably the firmest and biggest tits at the university!" They were talking, of course, about the tit queen, herself, she thought. She raised her head proudly, smiling widely, thinking about her dominance.
"Yeah, you saw how she destroyed that brunette bitch of Tammy?" One of them said. "I did, man, I was right by your side, and Jessie just ruined her." Naomi face change. "Who is Jessie?" she thought. "Oh yeah, I remember, tonight we got a new bitch in the sorority. It seems like she likes to test her titties, but who the fuck cares? If she wants to challenge me, she will have to wait in line". Naomi always wanted to stare at new contenders and see their fights. But that night, she was studying for a hard exam that she had just passed that morning. The guys continued their chatting.
"Did you see how she danced and flirted with Paul? I mean, she was victorious, but for sure she shouldn't do that to the queen's boyfriend". At that moment, Naomi approached the boys from the back and embraced two of them by the shoulders in a buddy position. Then she said, "Oh guys, by chance I just listened to what you were saying and, I mean, it's not that I care, but...you know, a queen can't allow some random rookie bitch to mock me flirting with my man, so... If you know her room, just to lend her a message, I'd be grateful".
"Yeah," one of the guys said, unable to deny anything to that goddess. "Her room is 306, I think."
"Thanks" Naomi said. "And don't forget to go to the main room at 11 o'clock to see a great show, better than the one tonight, I assure you". After that, Naomi called Paul "Hey yo, I just knew that you had some fun last night...yeah yeah, I know that you did nothing. You wouldn't do that until you knew she had beaten me and man...it won't happen anytime soon hahaha. Well, I'm calling you to tell you that I'm on my way to challenge that bitch for tonight. You will see how your queen smashes another cocky bitch...Oh, I see...so you say that she is really powerful. Uh, that's good info...what size? Oh 38D, It will be fun to take that bra as my trophy... yeah, I'll do it for you to know there's anybody at my level, bye".
So the tit queen of the sorority got to room 306 of the sorority building, and knocked on the door...In like ten seconds, the door cracked open and she could see just in front of her a couple of blue eyes, equally blue as hers in a surprised glare.
"Oh, you, hi." Jessie said, recognizing Naomi even though they hadn't met anytime before, but her fame predated the queen. "Nice to meet you. What do you need?" The rookie said. Jessie was blonde, veeery blonde, with long hair until her round ass. She was wearing a white t-shirt and jeans. The t-shirt just couldn't hide a little the huge amount of power that her breasts got. Naomi, looking at her from down to up, started talking.
"Hi, nice to meet you too!" She said in a false tone. "I just came here to congratulate you on your victory last night, I heard it was huge...even when Tammy is not a big deal, we must admit hahahaha...in any case, congratulations... Buuuuuuut, I heard some words out there about the way you celebrated it..." Naomi kept her smile. She wasn't threatening her opposite, she was just giving her the info.
"Oh my god, I mean, I'm sorry about that but you know, the rush of the victory turned me on and...let's be honest...Paul is the hottest guy in the sorority. He even knocked the shit out of that Spaniard ex of yours. He IS in fact, the real deal..." Jessie was talking in a confident and joyful way, but Naomi wasn't smiling at that moment.
"I know, and that's why he is MY boyfriend, so please, contain yourself the next time" Naomi said. She was considering not confronting that girl because she appeared so nice and avoided the conflict, but...
"Oh I see...but...you know...that's a thing that's up to him to decide...and he seemed very decided when he put his tongue inside my mouth and then licked my tits widely...so maybe you have to think about your position as """"girlfriend""" ". She made the quotation mark with her fingers as she said that last word. And that was enough for Naomi.
"That's, in fact, what I wanted to hear. I was a little disappointed about your will to fight, but I see that you want to show something. I'll show you something too, if you like...Tonight at eleven, just where you were last night. Yesterday you tasted the sweet flavour of victory. Tonight you will feel a very different sensation. " Naomi had just scheduled the duel in front of her now enemy.
"Yes, I guess that tonight I will feel the sensation of Paul's cock inside me after I kill those titties." Jessie responded with wit as she smiled widely. Naomi then pushed her tits forward against Jessie, who stood her ground, not moving and facing her foe. Naomi thought that it may be the funniest match she has had in a long time. "It will be fun to tear down these proud tits," she thought.
The hours passed, and half an hour before the scheduled hour of the duel, the members of the sorority began to gather in the main room. There was a throne near the north wall of the room, and sat on it, the tit queen, drinking a martini with a thin pink silk gown and waiting for her victim of that night.
Eleven o'clock arrived, and as the clock marked that hour, Jessie appeared, walking down the stairs with a beyond-sexy blue t-shirt which emphasized a huge cleavage. She seemed confident in herself, quite weird for a girl in her second match, but the last night's victory may have given her an overload of self-esteem. The queen smiled and got up, facing her rival.
"I'm glad you can join us finally." The queen said," staring eye to-eye at her contender. "Oh yeah, I couldn't miss this," Jessie replied. The people began to surround the soon-to-be fighters, waiting for the first attack. Naomi retired her gown slowly and sexily, showing everybody her magnificent assets of 36DD. On the other hand, Jessie took out her t-shirt, allowing everybody to admire her portentuous pair of 38D.
Both girls threw their clothes off at the same time and joined their tits with a huge direct thrust. And so the battle begins.
Chapter II: The Winter of Our Discontent
Both girls pressed their respective assets further, comparing themselves with the foe they were facing. They began to press more and more, hands on their hips, and looking how neither back down, they, simultaneously, began to move their shoulders in a circular way, trying to surpass, overcome, their enemy.
But no one was achieving a real advantage. Naomi looked at Jessie right in the eye as she thought, "Well, this bitch has already earned my respect, but it's time to take this to the next level." She hugged Jessie by her low back and pressed further. Jessie smiled as she did the same.
"Well, now we are talking," Jessie said, staring directly at the tit queen's eyes, and she began to make tit punches against her foe. The hug was close, but Jessie managed to move herself enough to attack in this way. Naomi responded in the same way, punching back mimically. Their hug began to soften as the punches became more and more savage, until they both only grabbed the other by the hips, giving space enough to deal huge punches to each other.
They began to go harder and harder until Naomi tried to deal a gigantous slap with both tits to her foe. But Jessie was fast enough to avoid the hit with a step back, and after that, she went forward with all her strength, dealing a powerful thrust from below that made Naomi's tits jiggle amazingly. Naomi did all she could to stop a moan from escaping her mouth and regain her feet, but as her tits stood firm again, Jessie attacked forward, giving Naomi a brutal frontal thrust.
Naomi couldn't help but open her mouth and shout a very audible "FUUUUUUUUCK!" as she stepped back a couple steps. Jessie laughed for the first time. Her voice was scratchy and low, and her laugh was deep and evil. Her laugh was as sexy as she herself. Naomi attacked suddenly, thrusting directly against her foe. Jessie grabbed her by the back and they began a new, but more intense, bearhug.
They intensified their bearhug as they rotated around the place, trying to unbalance their foe, trying to make her crumble back. They suddenly broke the embrace and they began to frantically swipe their breasts from left to right, smacking against their foe's furiously.
They were challenging their tits firmness, their raw power, their womanhood itself. Suddenly, Naomi felt their tits begin to soften, and Jessie's tits felt to her like wrecking balls. She slowed down her attack due to the damage her enemy was dealing to her. Jessie noticed it very fast and jumped forward, hitting the queen's tits in a vertical attack from above. hitting the top of Naomi's tits with all the weight of her own ones.
Naomi's knees failed in that point. And the next thing she saw was herself knelt down, looking directly at Jessie's belly. She looked up and saw Jessie's brutal tits and beautiful face. Smiling with evil. She was losing. Her tits hurt so much but if she grabbed them with her hands, it would mean defeat. She battled the need to caress her damaged titties and looked again at Jessie, who made a gesture with her head that only meant "c'mon, stand up and fight".
She was the queen, and as the queen, she got to stand up. She gathered all the strength she had left and got to her feet again. facing her opponent directly in the eyes. She was scared. Jessie wasn't. Jessie was...happy.
They pressed their tits again and joined in a brand new brutal bearhug. At that very moment, Naomi realised she was done. Her tits wasn't standing against her foe. They were completely softened by Jessie jugs. They were too hard and powerful. She was about to submit, to avoid further humiliation. But as she opened her mouth. Jessie kissed her savagely.
"She knew" Naomi, though. As Jessie kissed her, she was smiling, as she destroyed her rival's tits brutally. She wasn't only defeating the queen's tits. She had owned her mouth. Her kisses were way hotter than Naomi's. Jessie conquered Naomi's tongue with little fight from the queen.
Naomi's face began to tear as Jessie tightened the hug. The humiliation was absolutely clear. Naomi's back bent due to the power of Jessie's tits. She inverted the queen's tips inside her breasts and, after that, she made her enemy's tits begin to disappear, engulfed by the superior woman asset.
Before Naomi could cry her surrender, Jessie brought her to the floor, with her on top, and she saw her directly in the eyes "Seems as if we have a new queen," she whispered in her victim's ear. After that, she got up and then bombed her enemy's tits brutally, falling directly over the defeated woman's tits. Naomi felt as if her tits were completely depleted and the air abandoned her lungs.
Naomi looked at the crowd. There he was. Paul was watching the fight with a hungry glare, as his girlfriend was completely smashed by a better woman. She closed her eyes and began to sob as she finally said, "Please stop. I give. You're the best woman."
"What?" Jessie said, "You'll have to say it louder so everyone can hear you!" As she commanded it, she bombed again, making Naomi squeal like a pig.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH GOD, PLEASE LET ME GO, I GIVEIGIVEIGIVE. YOU'RE THE BEST WOMAN". Naomi cried out. Jessie laughed again, and asked.
"Who has the better tits?" She bombed again.
"YOUUU, PLEASE PLEASE STOP"
"Who is sexier?" She bombed again.
"OH MY GOD YOU ARE"
"Who is a better kisser?" She bombed again.
"OH PLEASE PLEASE YOU ARE THE BETTER KISSER, PLEASE LEAVE ME BEEEEEEEEE"
"Who's the queen" She bombed again. Naomi looked at her directly as tears were clouding her eyes.
".....YOU ARE, YOU ARE EVERYTHING AND I'M NOTHING, PLEASE STOP THIS".
"Stop what?!" Jessie asked.
"STOP DESTROYING MY TITS, STOP HUMILIATING ME, YOU'RE SO MUCH BETTER THAN ME."
Finally, Jessie whispered in Naomi's ear: "Who's worthy of Paul?"
Naomi stared at her and quietly said, "You are, Jessie, you".
As Jessie began to stand up, she grabbed Naomi's face from the chin and kissed her in a dominating way. She stood up and placed her feet on Naomi's tamed breast, placing her hands on her hips and allowing everyone to see how her tits, a little bit reddened, were as firm and full as at the beginning of the duel. She moved her feet from the breast of the defeated foe to her face, finally pressing against her cheek, looking at Paul at the same time.
She said loudly, "THE QUEEN IS DEAD...ALL HAIL THE QUEEN!!" And the sorority fellows began to clap with enthusiasm. Jessie grabbed Naomi by the hair and made her crawl as she walked towards Paul.
"Look at this, bitch," she said as she began to kiss the guy with hunger and passion. Her free hand grabbed his cock over the pants, which was completely erect and almost breaking the jean.
"IT'S ALL MINE NOW" And she released the hold on Naomi's hair, letting her fall as the defeated queen she was, sobbing on the floor, and berefitting of her crown. The new queen left the room, by the hand of the consort, heading for her room to claim the final prize. She raised her other arm with her little finger up.
A real Queen.
I think this is way more readable.
