[sinclairfan]

Dear TABSK--My name is Ellen, and I'm a 40 year old woman who is an avid reader of yours, who never thought I would have a reason to write to you.  Until earlier this week, at middle school open house.  My husband and I have two children in the school, so we both attended.  During one of the breaks in the hallways, I saw my husband getting an enthusiastic hug from one of the school mom's, Sharon, who I talked with frequently when our kids were in elementary school, but who I lost touch with as the years progressed.  Our kids had little in common, so I thought nothing of it.  I also, candidly, never cared much for Sharon anyways, so no great loss, I figured.  I walked up to Sharon and my husband, and was about to greet Sharon, when she broke the hug, avoided my eyes, and walked away.  I whispered to my husband, "Did she just snub me??".  He said, "Ya, sorta, didn't she?," and we stopped talking about her.  I can always tell when my husband is acting guilty, and he definitely wasn't, even though I had just busted him in a hug.  So this isn't what my question is about.  My question is about what happened when I got home.  I naturally looked up Sharon on Facebook.  TABSK, Sharon is separated as of this past summer and is in the process of getting divorced!!!  Now, TABSK, I'll handle this.  I'm not calling for a pep talk like some other of your MILF readers do.  I'm ready to rumble.  Rather, my question is about tactics.  Do I fire a warning shot across Sharon's bow, and give her the pleasure of knowing I'm the jealous-wife type?  Do I disclose my knowledge of her divorce to my husband, and let him know there's a hot to trot mom available?  Acting at this point seems less prudent than just watching and waiting.  Ellen

Dear Ellen--We can see you are indeed an avid reader.  Recently divorced rivals are the worst sort to be in a triangle with, since it's likely been several years since they've had good sex, and they'll be very savvy in pursuing it with your partner.  You need to proceed with extreme caution vis-a-vis your husband, but it sounds like you are doing that.  And, yes, watch and wait .....  BUT ..... know that you are being watched as well.  Her snub of you was quite intentional and quite telling.  She senses that you are not to be crossed unless absolutely necessary.  That's good.  Maybe she'll find lower hanging fruit than your husband.  That would be our approach.  For now.  TABSK

[sinclairfan]

Dear TABSK--Ellen, here again, the suburban soccer Mom "on watch" against my divorcing rival Sharon.  Part of my soccer Mom duties were to host this weekend's middle school sleepover amongst a group of girls in Sharon's circle and mine.  I was looking forward to confiding Sharon's divorce and iciness towards me to a third Mom in our group, Becca.  For reasons I never fully understood, Becca and her husband were occassional invitees to the lakehouse of Sharon and her husband over the years, so I was hoping Becca would have details for me on Sharon's divorce.  Sharon arrived first for the sleepover dropoff, and continued her icy demeanor to me, rebuffing every attempt of mine to engage.  She finally brushed me off with a "Ellen, I have bigger fish to fry than you tonight!" harrumph, and sped off.  When Becca arrived for the dropoff of her children, I started telling her the story of the deteriorating relations between Sharon and me, hoping to elicit further clues from her, and she teased me with a, "Yes, Sharon and I are going to take advantage of our kid-free status tonight to engsge in some .... long ... overdue .... girltalk.  Just she and I, if you know what I mean."  I spent the entire night not getting more than a wink or two of sleep, anxiously awaiting the Sunday morning pickup to get Sharon's and Becca's respective versions of their Girltalk Summit.  Disappointingly, each was reluctant to exit her vehicle, hiding their faces in hoodies and sunglasses, and driving off with their daughters with just cursory greetings to me.  I got a better look at Becca's face, and saw it covered with scratches and missing patches of hair.  TABSK, I'm making an educated guess that Becca and Sharon engaged in some sort of catfight last night--that's not my question.  My question is:  has Sharon's prowling for other women's husbands been satiated, or do I still need to keep up my watch?  Ellen

Dear Ellen--You are the Mistress of the "I'm not asking you x, I'm asking you y" question format.  As such, we believe you are not asking about Sharon's next move vis-a-vis husbands [including yours] in your neighborhood, but about Sharon's next move vis-a-vis wives [including you].  Specifically, will you get the opportunity that Becca got last night--to engage in a cul de sac chickfight.  Every catfight career has certain boxes to be checked:  the after-school fight under the bleachers, the Facebook summer gossip catfight, the college catfight against the hometown ex, the engagement catfight against the high school sweetheart (or, for bonus points, against one of the bridemaids), the job interview catfight, the promotion catfight.  You, Ellen, have passed these age markers, and have either ticked off, or not ticked off, these boxes.  You are now at the cul de sac chickfight box.  Becca can now check off that box.  And Sharon has moved on to the next one:  the wife vs ex-wife divorce drama catfight, one of our favorites.  Being competitive, you don't want to get left behind in their dust.  There's no predicting these things, but our best guess is:  Sharon is still on her post-divorce sex bender.  She appears to be attracted to your husband, and has been given good reason not to take Becca's.  Sharon's path and yours may still cross.  Best of luck.  TABSK

[JT Edson]

Nice set up.