[sinclairfan]

Dear TABSK:  My name is Julianna, a 52 year old blonde MILF, and I grew up with TABSK and your advice (and your readers' tips and tricks!), and have needed to use them on a couple occasions.  My only daughter, Kendyl, is 20 years old, and navigating her college years thru a pandemic.  She is doing classes from home, so one blessing is that she and I have been spending quite a bit of time together.  She has a serious boyfriend, who in turn has a lifelong "friend" named Carmen, who is a knockout 10 brunette.
I've warned by daughter numerous times, based on how her boyfriend talks about Carmen, and how Carmen talks about Kendyl, that Carmen is a threat to my daughter's relationship.  I can't get my daughter to take me (or Carmen) seriously, and when my daughter gets tired of my nagging, she tells me that her generation is different than mine when it comes to female "friends"; that boys and girls can be "friends without benefits".
Am I out of touch?  Or are certain male/female dynamics forever?  ~Julianna  (p.s. Kendyl is a 9 or even a 9.5, but she's no Carmen)

Dear Julianna--Certain male/female dynamics change with time, and certain other ones do not.  But never mind that.  One thing which never changes is a mother's intuition.  If you think Carmen is a threat, then chances are ..... Carmen is a threat.  Have you considered going online and tracking Carmen's online persona?  Does she have guy friends?  Or is she clingy with Kendyl's man.  And, as for you and Kendyl:  have you had "the talk"?  You mention you grew up with TABSK .... but DID SHE?  Does she knew sometimes the Carmen's in our life need to be .... handled?  You mentioned no fighting experience for Kendyl, even tho she's 20.  Isn't it past time?  TABSK

[sinclairfan]

Dear Readers:  The recent letter from Julianna, and, to a lesser extent, our initial response, unleased a firestorm of responses.  We normally don't like to provide just excerpts of letters, since they inevitably remove important context, but we felt we've captured the main themes here.

> "You ask if Kendyl has ever fought.  Clearly she hasn't, and shame on you Julianna for being raised by TABSK, but not passing along its mist important lesson:  a girl who has never fought is no woman--she's a girl."

> "Carmen talking about Kendyl .... not Kendyl's boyfriend .... is telling.  Carmen has no reason to be talking about Kendyl, good OR bad.  Kendyl needs to hear what Carmen is saying about her, face to face.  Or Carmen needs to stop.  Carmen's choice."

> "Yes, yes, yes, Julianna needs to be on social media, lurking on Carmen's accounts.  But no stalking.  Know the difference."

> "Every month that goes by that Carmen has no man of her own, the threat increases."

> "Women who are 10's have a harder time meeting men than 9's do.  Men are intimidated by 10's.  Is Carmen a threat?  Hell, yes."

> "Step up, Kendyl.  Mom won't be there forever to fight your battles."

[sinclairfan]

Dear TABSK-- Julianna here, again; or, really, Kendyl's Mom, since that's whose drama I'm butt in my nose into (but only because I feel I fave to).  I was, of course, stung by the feedback I received from both you and your readers.  But after I counted to 10, took a deep breath  and thought about you were all saying, I thought to myself:  "You know what?  They're right.  I've been a negligent mother to Kendyl.  She and I have never had The Talk."  I finally did sit down with her last night, and here's the gist of how it went.

> Kendyl, you and I need to talk.  We should have discussed this 4 years ago, but we will now.

> Oh, gawd Mom, not another thing I probably already know about.

> Kendyl, have you ever been in a catfight?

> So, what, you look wanted me suspended from school?  Real mature, Mom.

> Of course you shouldn't catfight at school, ....  IF it can avoided.  But you didn't walk away from any school catfights, did you? ..... look at me, DID YOU??

> Maybe .... but not because I was afraid!

> Oh, for what reason then, Kendyl??

> More than one, Mom.

> OK, let's hear them.  And I have all night.

> Well, to start with .... school bathroom floors are gross.

> You'll get no argument from me there.  You were challenged in a school bathroom and walked away??

> Not challenged .... there.  Just, ya know, "Meet me in the school bathroom after 5th period."

> Kendyl.... I hope your reply wasn't "No, the floors are gross."

> I just didn't .... show up.

> And that was all??

> Pretty much.

> Don't you see how cowardly that looks?? And how that girl told ALL HER FRIENDS and ALL YOUR FRIENDS that you were afraid to face her??

> Let them think what they want.

> No, DO NOT let them think what they want.

> Because?

> Because that turns into that bitch Carmen thinking what she wants.

> Such as?

> Such as that she can steal your boyfriend.

> She can't.

> Because.

> Because, if she tried, I'd deck her.

> Does she know that??

> She should.

> And how?  Have you told her?

> No.

> Then HOW does she know.

> Will you help me tell her?

> You need to do the dirty work.  But I can help.

> I'll sleep on it.

> Don't wait long.

~Julianna

Dear Julianna--We're with you on this one.  This talk happened late.  Don't wait long.  TABSK

[sinclairfan]

Dear TABSK--It's Julianna, again.  The mom with the too-timid-a-catfighter-by-half daughter Kendyl, who lets her boyfriend's friend Carmen too much leash around him.  I gave Kendyl "the talk" that she needs to put Kendyl on notice.  Which she did.  By recording my chat with her on her cell phone as it was happening--and FaceTime'ing it to Carmen.  Who immediately gave it to Carmen's mom.  Who, after counting to 10 but not much higher, somehow got my cell number and called me, and demanded I FaceTime with her.  Carmen's mom (Rose) is my age and build, although much rougher around the edges--some Latin nationality, at least partially.  She must be the source of Carmen's mixed race exoticness.  Anyways, Rose thinks instead of Carmen and Kendyl getting together, it should be her and I.  Which I have not the least reservation doing, mind you.  Carmen is a side-chick-waiting-to-happen, and I told Rose that.  She wants Carmen with her at our "meeting"; I do NOT want Kendyl there.  Kendyl will be the sitting duck in that room.  I made arrangements with Rose--she encouraged me to change my mind about bringing Kendyl.  I'm going--but who's right about bringing Kendyl:  her or me?  Julianna

Dear Julianna--If you had contacted Rose without Kendyl's involvement-you are.  But didn't Kendyl start this, accidentally or on purpose?  She needs to see the consequences.  We suspect you won't follow our advice--but we recommend you do.  And good luck with Rose.  TABSK

[snw]

Enjoying this set up. I would say definitely Kendyl needs to be present or maybe Julianna’s man to assure Carmen doesn’t get involved. Although it would be pretty hot as well if Rose was single too and Julianna’s guy and Kendyl’s bf both were there to watch their girl’s go to it. Can’t wait to see this play out.