[Glamour Fights]

Click here for current standings and won/loss records

All the fighters are ready to start the New Year off right with a victory. They wish you all

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

This is a small change in the rules this time. A submission or a pin is not enough for the win. The winner must also make the loser loudly proclaim that the winner is a better  and sexier woman than her

Cathy Lee Crosby	Lindsay Wagner
25 years old	20 years old
5'7½” 128 lbs BMI: 19.8	5'9” 125 lbs BMI: 18.5
35B-23-34	34A/B-24-36
14th 28pts 14-14-0	27th 12pts 6-22-0

I am expecting an athletic battle between Cathy Lee, a former tennis player, and the Lindsay Wagner, the bionic woman. Lindsay is practicing some bionic woman jumps to psych herself up. Cathy Lee has chosen a sci-fi motif to gl along with Lindsay’s bionic woman. Cathy Lee stands hands on hips challenging Lindsay show seems more than willing to jump on her with a sudden rush.
Cathy Lee Crosby: I think I will spend most of my time chasing Lindsay. She knows I am too powerful for her and will get scared and run away from me. In a hand to hand battle she stands no chance. This is going to be a fun fight for me.
Lindsay Wagner: I think Lindsay is counting her victory a little early. She is a lumbering ox compared to me. It will appear like she is the one in slow motion when I dance rings arund her. I will hit and kick her at will. I am practicing my dancing for joy steps.

Ann-Margret Olsson	Joey Heatherton
28 years old	25 years old
5'5" 120 lbs BMI: 20.0	5'5” 112 lbs BMI: 18.7
35D-23-35	34C-20-32
2nd 52pts 26-2-0	8th 42pts 21-7-0

Another important fight as Ann-Margret is chasing Elke Sommer and Joey Heatherton would love to move ahead of Raquel Welch. This should be a long, great fight as both are athletic, both have lots of stamina. Both are dancers with strong legs, good balance, and good body control. Both are singers with great lung capacity. And both love to catfight so it will be a wild catfight with lots of good wrestling moves.
Ann-Margret Olsson: Sorry, GF, it isn’t going to be that long of a fight. I am going to knock Joey out quickly so I can go and help Jill beat Elke. One of these women has to step up and beat Elke. I did my part and beat her and I think Jill can do it with some cheering and directions from me.
Joey Heatherton: The only way Ann-Margret will watch Elke whip Jill’s ass is from underneath me. Both us blondes will beat those stupid redheads. I am going to enjoy watching Jill thrash Elke while playing with Ann-Margret’s nipples.

Raquel Welch	Annette Funicello
29 years old	27 years old
5'5” 118 lbs BMI: 19.7	5'3” 118 lbs BMI: 20.9
37C-22½-35½	36C-22-36
7th 42pts 21-7-0	25th 16pts 8-20-0

Raquel is strutting her stuff as only she can strut, striking a pose like the sexy superstar she knows herself to be. Annette has that wholesome girl-next-door look. She seems happy to be in the tournament in spite of some harsh words to the contrary by barbosa. Annette is definitely not conceding the fight and Raquel had better beware if she knows what is good for her.
Raquel Welch: WHAT IS THIS SHIT? I thought this was a sex symbol tournament. I am the sexiest woman alive and you send this ugly boyish looking waif to fight me? I deserve more respect than that. I am not sure I even want to get my hands dirty on her greasy hair. Are you sure she is a woman? She has a moustache and man would be proud of.
Annette Funicello: Typical prima donna Raquel, isn’t it. I have millions of fan mail that declare how sexy I am. Raquel will be so busy looking in the mirror she won’t see me give her a good one in the belly. I am Italian and I know how to catfight. Had lots of fights behind the scenes on “The Mousketeer Show” with women who were jealous of my popularity. And I won them all. Raquel has a soft belly and a glass jaw. I will be the one standing when this is all over.

Britt Ekland	Sharon Tate
27 years old	26 years old
5'5" 110 lbs BMI: 18.3	5'5” 112 lbs BMI: 18.7
34B-22-34	36B-22-35
24th 16pts 8-20-0	16th 26pts 13-15-0

If you like slender but shapely blondes then this is a fight for you. Britt and Sharon could be clones of each other. The other appeal of this fight is that it should be intense and very even. Brunettes will love seeing two blondes rip each others hair out. Sharon has the better record but is somewhat down coming off an embarrassing loss to Tuesday Weld. Britt is upbeat having knock Nancy Kwan senseless.
Britt Ekland: From what I heard Sharon and Nancy had a back stage fight at their Matt Helm movie and Nancy kicked Sharon’s ass. I kicked Nancy’s ass so where does that leave Sharon but with a kick-ass squared beating. I wonder how far I can boot her skinny ass.
Sharon Tate: There was no fight between Nancy and me except in the movie where I kicked her butt. And if there were I would have won. Britt Ekland is going to need all the humor that Peter Sellers can provide to cheer up after I leave her battered on the floor.

Edy Williams	Barbara Bach
27 years old	22 years old
5'7" 128 lbs BMI: 20.1	5''7” 116 lbs BMI: 18.2
37D-23-37	36B-24-35
23rd 18pts 9-19-0	26th 13pts 6-21-1

Edy has chosen to fight as a brunette this time. She and Barbara strike similar poses to show off which one has the better body. I am going to keep my mouth shut but you can venture a comment if yo want. Edy is heavier and has the better record. But she was hurt badly by Cassandra Peterson and most likely is still recovering. Barbara had fun battering Jaclyn Smith and doesn’t see why that shouldn’t stop with Edy.
Edy Williams: Yes, I’m sore but I’m not worried abut Barbara. She is so weak her punches will feel like massages to me. You are going to see the most punishing grapevine ever inflicted on someone as I crush her.
Barbara Bach: Everyone knows Edy is juts a lot of hot air, be it blonde, brunette, or redhead. I am going to knock the hot air out of her. She won’t be able to grapevine anything after I spread her legs and stomp on her overused pussy. That phony is going down!

Jaclyn Smith	Cassandra Peterson
24 years old	20 years old
5'7" 118 lbs BMI: 18.5	5'7" 118 lbs BMI: 18.5
34½B-24-35	34D-21-34
30th 6pts 3-25-0	10th 41pts 20-7-1

Jaclyn Smith has a look of confidence I have not seen before. Will it be enough for her to beat Cassandra. I love it when Cassandra fights nude. She has a bush that most women shave off these days. She is lifting her top as if to say to Jaclyn “Look how superior my breasts are. Do you want a taste of them?”
Jaclyn Smith: Cassandra or Elvira or whatever she calls herself is nothing but a slut. At least I won’t have to pull her wig off to get to her hair. And I won’t have to strip her to get to her bush. Look at that nice thick bush. Boy am I going to have fun ripping it out. It is appropriate she is blowing that candle out as I am going to put her lights out.
Cassandra Peterson: Ha ha, the only way Jaclyn will get to my bush is when it is rubbing on her face. I am going to make her feel what a real woman’s body feels like. And yes, I am blowing the candle out so it is more romantic when I fuck the shit out of her.

Victoria Principal	Senta Berger
19 years old	28 years old
5'5” 115 lbs BMI: 19.2	5'5” 127 lbs BMI:  21.2
37C-23-35	38D-26-36
17th 26pts 13-15-0	6th 45pts 22-5-1

A fight between two gorgeous redheads with Senta being the most gorgeous redhead in the fight according to barbosa. Victoria disagrees but thanks barbosa has poor tastes since he ranks Raquel so high. Senta has dyed her hair almost strawberry red from her normally darker color. Victoria is coming off the worst beating in a long time by Sybil Danning. It will be a testament to her courage if she even shows up to fight a though Senta. And Senta is more riled up than normal. She is furious with having lost to an inferior woman, Linda Evans. She is even more furious that some have suggested that fan interference got her back into the fight after Linda was beating her up. Victoria is planning on Senta being too angry and too worked up. An angry fighter is generally not a good fighter and Victoria thinks she can take advantage of the mistakes Senta will make in her rage.
Victoria Principal: Senta is big and tough, emphasis on the big. I have a much better hour glass figure. She has such a thick waist I think she might be preggers.
Senta Berger: Look at Victoria trying to thrust her chest out. I don’t have to do that and it is still obvious I have the better chest. I will swat her around like I am swatting a fly. Or more like a mosquito for that she what she reminds me of, buzzing around like an airhead. And if I hear any suggestion about fans helping me I will kick you in the nuts. This won’t be a fair fight because Victoria is just too overmatched.

Pam Grier	Stefanie Powers
20 years old	27 years old
5'8” 120 lbs BMI: 18.3	5'7” 118 lbs BMI: 18.5
38D-22-36	36B-25-35
9th 41pts 20-7-1	29th 6pts 3-25-0

Talk about being furious, Pam is like a caged animal pacing her cage waiting for he next meal, er, fight. She is both embarrassed and enraged after losing to Adrienne Barbeau, a nothing as far as Pam is concerned. She has even dressed in one of her Coffy outfits to get in the proper frame of mind. You would think that Stefanie would be scary shitless but she doesn’t seems so. She is smiling and seems ready to take on Pam in spite of Pam’s opening her hands as if to say, “Come and get it if you dare”. Stefanie dares. She figures if a wimp like Adrienne can beat Pam than so can she. Pam is ever wearing the same Afro which will be great for yanking her about.
Pam Grier: My claws are itching and my blood is boiling. Let’s get this on right now so I can rip Stefanie to shreds. Gland you gave me a weakling that I can vent my anger on. This is going to be the biggest beat down ever!!!
Stefanie Powers : Why should I be scarred of her. I never lost to a reputation before. We are about the same size. She is 2 pounds heavier than me and all that is in her hair and her fatty tissue in her tits. Fatty tissue I will be able to sink my claws into. Adrienne has shown the way to beat Pam and I will do the same as she did.

[Vassago]

My set of picks over these fights:  Looks like I've caught this early and the voting doesn't distract my original thoughts!

Cathy Lee Crosby vs Lindsay Wagner
Neither of these women was able to make use of good physical bodyshape in this competition and quite frankly Lindsay has been one of the most underachieving of them all. Cathy also has lost some fights where she was allegedly superior woman and now it's all about saving some pride more then anything else. I'm more convinced that Cathy would be able to take Lindsay down with one or two well measured kicks and in the strictly wrestling department she's also a better woman. In the end Lindsay gets knocked out and isn't able to admit Cathy is the better woman simply because she ends up unconscious on the floo.

Ann Margaret vs Joey Heatherton
Joey ranks among Top 5 of my personal aggressive women here (along with Pam Grier, Martine Beswick, Luciana Paluzzi and Cassandra Peterson) but Ann Margaret can be as vicious as anyone especially considering she's still in the mix for the overall title. This won't be an easy fight for her and Joey will do more then significant damage to redhead's face before eventually finding out Ann is even more vicious and literally tears Joey's face apart. Ann then manages to smother her blonde rival on the ground and relentless pounding finally removes all of Joey's fighting spirit and forces her into submission backed up by a loud confession of Ann Margaret's superiority.

Raquel Welch vs Annette Funicello
Talk about a bad schedule for Annette, Elke and Raquel back-to-back is a recipe for catfighting suicide. Given the fact Raquel is angry like hell after going down to Jill St. John this will be a short and one-sided fight with the self proclaimed sexiest redhead on the planet tossing poor brunette like a training dummy all over the place. A good chance Raquel gets the biggest win of the entire round allthough Dian Parkinson has other ideas!

Britt Ekland vs Sharon Tate
Just like against Tuesday Weld, Sharon Tate will be involved in a fast and furious action against another lightweight blonde but this time she'll be having the last laugh. It's almost certain both women will try to leave each other bald with vicious hairpulling right from the start but despite losing some chunks of her own, Sharon would be able to rip more hair out of Britt and finally it's the Swedish blonde that crumbles on her knees and whimpers her submission.

Edy Williams vs Barbara Bach
Almost an upset, but not quite. Edy is still feeling Cassandra Peterson's claws all over her body while Barbara has a walk in the park against Jaclyn Smith. Barbara knows she can't allow Edy to wear her out and is vulnerable to some aggressive attacks right from the start. Indeed, in a rarely seen rage of bravery, Barbara jumps on Edy right after the command is given and she drives forward with her head and catches the surpeised Edy in the stomach. Edy gets uppended and Barbara claws her nails in the opponent's eyes trying to scratch it out! Edy begins to verbally abuse Barbara but she lacks strenght to get Barbara off her chest. Barbara nearly loses control of action by allowing Edy to get up on her knees, but manages to roll around and trap Edy in a headlock which firmly takes the fight out of Edy who groans in anger but is being roughed up by Barbara who backs up the headlock with some hairpulling and Edy can't take it anymore and gives up.

Jaclyn Smith vs Cassandra Peterson
I might have singled out Dian and Raquel as the best prospects for the biggest beatdown but Cassandra is the third pick and I see no reason why she doesn't want to destroy Jaclyn as badly as she can. It's hard to imagine that Jaclyn would stay upright for more then five seconds and once she's taken to the ground, Cassandra will beat her up senseless.

Victoria Principal vs Senta Berger
After losing to Linda Evans, Senta is another furious redhead and Victoria got roughed up by Sybil Danning, so that also tells a story. Senta has obviously expressed her wrath at Victoria's breasts and she'll do just fine by ripping it to shreds. Apart from a messed up boobs, Victoria is more then likely to lose more hair as Senta is on a mission to absolutely demolish a woman whom she considers a perfect victim. In the end Senta rips Victoria's scalp and takes it as a battle trophy and beats the fellow redhead in a complete pulp displaying what an angry woman can do to the inferior opponent.

Pam Grier vs Stefanie Powers
There is no biggest beatdown of this round here only because Stefanie gives up after a couple of punches and admits Pam is a superior woman. This confession only makes Pam even more furious because she wanted to beat her up senseless and is shockingly deprived of this opportunity! But wait... Stefanie wants to leave the room and finds out the door is locked and Pam displays a grim smile.... Maybe the biggest beatdown is still on the cards then? And it's Stefanie that will be carried away on a stretcher once Pam is finished with her... One thing can be taken for granted though, there's not a slightest chance of Pam losing this fight...

[byline]

I finally found these polls on page 5. It is a shame that such great polls with so much work put into them get shoved down so far by a plethora of polls with little or no work. It is a shame that more people don’t comment. I guess we all have our interests.

Cathy Lee Crosby beats Lindsay Wagner
I consider both Cathy Lee Crosby and Lindsay Wagner as underachievers. Lindsay is stronger and more athletic than given credit for. Cathy is stronger and just as athletic or more so than Lindsay. Cathy and Lindsay put on a great display of athletic fighting. Cathy is superior and quickly has Lindsay in a punishing hold that Lindsay cannot withstand.

Ann-Margret beaten by Joey Heatherton
Glamour Fights introduction and Vasago’s comments are key to my opinion. Glamour Fights puts Ann-Margret and Joey as well matched in physical and endurance characteristics. Ann-Margret is not used to having someone match up in leg strength and stamina. My opinion is that Joey may have the stronger legs. When you combine that with her greater aggressiveness her constant attack will wear Ann-Margret down who well be on defense more than offense. It will be the hardest fought battle and probably the longest. Once Joey conquers Ann-Margret she has her fun by making Ann-Margret sing her surrender.

Raquel Welch beats Annette Funicello
No reason for Raquel Welch not to strut her stuff. She has a lot of stuff to strut. Little Annette Funicello will suffer greatly at Raquel’s hands as Raquel can also be one mean bitch when she has a weaker foe at her mercy. This won’t be the biggest beat down but Annette will produce the greatest number of tears for the longest time as Raquel punishes and hurts her over and over.

Britt Ekland beaten by Sharon Tate
If I said some other fight would be the closest I have changed my mind. This one will be but not the hardest fought battle. Britt Ekland and Sharon Tate are physically equals. I agree with Vasago it will be fast and furious with lots of blonde chucks scattered all over the ground. Sharon has proven to be the better fighter against similar rivals so I predict an eventual win ofr Sharon.

Edy Williams beats Barbara Bach
At these weights 12 pounds can be a significant advantage or not depending on the skill level and aggressiveness of the fighters. There isn’t a lot of difference in those two attributes between Edy Williams and Barbara Bach. I see Edy being able to use her weight advantage against the slender Barbara. She will use her body to pin Barbara down and wear her out. Once Barbara tires Edy will finish her off with a grapevine.

Jaclyn Smith beaten by Cassandra Peterson
I wonder what women has suffered the most number of worst beat downs. Jaclyn Smith has certainly suffered the absolute worst beat down at the hands of Sybil Danning in the annuals of celebrity fighting as far as I can discover. Cassandra Peterson has every intention of giving Jaclyn the worst beat down in round 29. She has competition from some other fights but she could well do it. That is unless she decides to turn to sexual arousal and pleasure herself at Jaclyn’s expense.

Victoria Principal beaten by Senta Berger
The character of a woman is indicated by how she responds after losing a fight to a woman she considers her inferior. After Senta Berger lost to Jill St. John she beat Annette Funicello senseless. Perhaps that is not a major achievement but it does indicate her attitude after losing. Now Senta lost to Linda Evans who she considers an overachieving wimp who doesn’t match her in beauty, strength or fighting ability. Based on previous fights Senta will come out to destroy Victoria Principal. Hence this is another candidate for the worst beat down. Victoria is well set up for such a beating since she is reeling from horrible beatings in her last seven fights. It would surprise me if she would need help just getting to the venue. 

Pam Grier beats Stefanie Powers
Three fights in a row which could be the worst beat down as Pam Grier takes delight in trying to break every bone in Stefanie Powers’ body. Pam lost to Adrienne Barbeau, of all people, and her image as a tough, nasty fighter has been diminished. The only way she can redeem it is by taking a weak woman like Stefanie and totally destroying her both mentally and physically. There is one way Pam can lose this fight. That way is if she breaks her hand hitting Stefanie too hard. It is either that or breaking Stefanie’s jaw. I do like Vasago saying the door is locked so Stefanie can’t run away which she will be wont to do.

[Glamour Fights]

Thanks to all the comments and opinions. With an odd number of experts this time at least there were definite predictions, that is unless someone predicted a tie which no on did.

Cathy Lee Crosby 51 vs Lindsay Wagner 46{Pundits 3-0}: All the pundits liked Cathy Lee in this fight and all seem to think that Cathy Lee was stronger and wouldn’t have much problem with Lindsay. Lindsay came out jumping and trying to look like the Bionic Woman. Cathy Lee just laughed. She grabbed her around the legs on one of Lindsay’s jumps and threw her over her shoulder. She paraded Lindsay around, spanking her ass not and then for humiliation. The fight could have been more one sided but Cathy seemed to be enjoying parading Lindsay around on her shoulders rather than torturing her to gain points. A close score but the fight was not as close as the score.

Ann-Margret 57 vs Joey Heatherton 40 {Pundits 2-1 }: The experts were in favor of Ann-Margret winning with byline being the odd man out for Joey. Vasago and barbosa picked Ann-Margret but in a close fight. In a way I agree with them that Joey is one of the women similar to Ann-Margret in being a dancer and a singer. So this could have been a close fight. Ann-Margret had vowed to finish Joey off quickly so she could go support Jill St. John over Elke Sommer. Ann-Margret grabbed Joey by the hair and quickly put her into a waist scissors. She proved to Joey and everyone else that when it came to squeezing power Joey was not in Ann-Margret’s league. She won quickly and off she went to voice her comments in the Jill vs Elke fight. She gave Joey the 6th worst beating this round.

Raquel Welch 59 vs Annette Funicello 39{Pundits 3-0}: It isn’t too much of a surprise that all the pundits picked Raquel to give Annette a thrashing. Raquel is reported to be one of the biggest prima donnas around. She still believes she should be winning this tournament and attributes a few “unlucky” loses to have put her out of contention. Her last two fights are against Elke Sommer and Senta Berger. She has vowed to rip these two women to shreds to prove she is the best. Annette wanted to prove barbosa wrong that she didn’t belong in this contest. She set her mind on being his beloved Raquel and giving him what he enjoys – seeing her tortured and dominated by another woman. The mind was willing but the flesh was weak, too weak and not nearly vicious enough for the wild and angry Raquel. Raquel over matched Annette in every facet of the fight and left her whimpering and bawling with almost no hair left. Then Raquel went over to join Ann-Margret to help Jill defeat Elke but saw the opposite happen. Rumors persist that Raquel held Elke after the fight while Ann-Margret worked her over to soften up Elke for her fight with Raquel. These rumors have been unsubstantiated and none of the three are talking.

Britt Ekland 41vs Sharon Tate 52 {Pundits 1-2}: Sharon Tate had reached her stride and was going pretty well until she stumbled against Tuesday Weld. That is what she said literally, she stumbled and Tuesday stomped on her back. Britt Ekland had pounded Nancy Kwan and say no reason she couldn’t do the same to the lightweight Sharon. It figured to be a great, close fight between two almost identically built women, both who seemed to fight more on guts than skill. The pundits favored Sharon slightly with barbosa being the odd man out this time. Barbosa though Britt was a little bit tougher but the opposite proved to be true. In fact the fight wasn’t as close or as back and forth as the experts suggested. One Sharon go ahold of Britt’s hair and managed to get her off her feet she started to drag her around by the hair. Try as she would, Britt couldn’t bet back on her feet as Sharon would yank her down again. Finally Sharon dropped on her to straddle Britt and schoolgirl pin her.

Edy Williams 49 vs Barbara Bach 46 {Pundits 2-1}: Edy was favored by the pundits but not overwhelmingly. Vasago was the odd man out for this fight. Vasago thought Edy would be too beat up after her fight with Cassandra Peterson. Edy is one of the heavier fighters but perhaps it is soft flesh and not muscle as she has not done well. Barbara is lighter and thus has an excuse for her poorer performance. This was a long fight between equals as barbosa said. Edy’s weight eventually wore Barbara down as she pressed down on her whenever she was on top. Finally Barbara was too tired to roll them over and Edy got a close win. She tied for the closest fight of the round.

Jaclyn Smith 22 vs Cassandra Peterson 74 {Pundits 0-3}: It seemed a foregone conclusions by all the experts that Cassandra would whip Jaclyn, the only question was by how much. Both Vasago and byline gave Cassandra a good chance to get the worst beatdown this round. Boy did she!  The second worst beatdown of Goldie Hawn by Suzanne Somers was a distant 2nd. In fact it was so bad it ranked 5th in to all time beatdown list, just behind Cassandra’s beatdown of Stefanie Powers. It seems when Cassandra has a weak one she really goes after her. Cassandra didn’t even use her evil Elvira persona to get her in the mood to rake Jaclyn over the coals. She came out with her pussy fuzz exposed and her breasts half exposed, tempting Jaclyn to grab for them. Jaclyn went for Cassandra’s big tits. Cassandra tried to rip Jaclyn’s tits off but could hardly get ahold of her B-cup tiny titties. Later on Cassandra said there is no way she is a B-cup, more like a AA. So Cassandra ripped down Jaclyn’s bottoms and went after her clean shaven pussy along with her full head of hair. The torture was too much and Jaclyn tried to give up immediately. But Cassandra had her sights set on giving her the worst beatdown and didn’t stop. She even resisted sexually assaulting Jaclyn to concentrate on whipping her ass.

Victoria Principal 41 vs Senta Berger 55 {Pundits 0-3}: A unanimous decision for Senta by the pundits. All give Victoria some credit for being a determined fighter who gives her all but just too physically inferior to Senta. Both Vasago and byline pointed out that Senta would be even more vicious and cruel than normal after having lost her last fight to Linda Evans, “that overrated bitch” in Senta’s opinion. Byline even suggested that Senta might win the worst beat down contest. True to form Victoria put up as tough a battle as she could. And true to form Senta overpowered her. Senta’s constant body blows took their toll on Victoria’s sexy body. Senta had Victoria at her mercy but then let up and did not even try for the worst beat down against the helpless Victoria. Perhaps she felt sorry for her (unlikely). Or perhaps she figured she shouldn’t take all her anger out on Victoria. It would be better to save some of that anger and some energy for her fights with Sybil Danning and Raquel Welch, both of whom she wanted to humiliate.