[Glamour Fights]

Burke’s Law – Who Killed Alex Debbs Year 1 Episode 6 aired on 25 Oct 1963 featured a fight between Maxine Borman, played by Diana Dors, and Angela Pattison, played by Suzy Parker. Burke’s Law featured several guests stars in each episode, many of who were gorgeous women. Often they were established stars and sometimes up and coming stars. Each week I waited for a catfight among the beautiful and sexy women or even between hags and beautiful women. But this was the only catfight I remember. There were a few slaps or quick punches from time to time but no catfight to compare with this one. And I thought it was a very good catfight. Unfortunately this fight was stopped without a clear winner. So in part 1 of the polls who do you think would have won if the fight hadn’t been stopped? Rather than giving details and my description of how each character fought just look at the video and make up your own mind. Remember for this part of the poll you must decide  how the characters would fare against each other, not necessarily which the actress would prevail in a real fight between them.

Maxine Borman  {Diana Dors}	Angela Pattison {Suzy Parker}
Born: 23 Oct 1931 (31 when filmed)	Born: 28 Oct 1932 (30 when filmed)
Swindon, Wiltshire, England	San Antonio, Texas, USA
5’7” (170 cm) 36½D-24-35	5' 10" (178m) 35-24-36

I don’t know the weight of either. I estimated Diana’s weight at 133 lbs. during by 1950s tournament (year 1956). Actually she was probably a little lighter at that time but I remember the more filled out and fleshy Diana Dors. She gained weight during the 1960s and so her weight around 135 lbs. in 1963 probably isn’t too far off her real weight. Suzy Parker was 3” taller (or 4” if the listings of 5’6” for Diana are correct). She was no longer the waif model so her weight was most likely close to Diana’s even though she was slimmer. Note, Diana’s measurements are from Celebrity Sleuth but she was probably bigger in the waist and hips in 1963. Also Suzy is probably a little bigger than the listed stats in 1963. So my guess is that for the characters and the actresses Angela (Suzy) is about 3” taller than Maxine (Diana) and both are close to the same weight.

Now for part 2 of the poll.
Instead of the characters we fantasize about Suzy Parker and Diana Dors getting into this catfight. It starts out as filmed in the video. But there is no choreography and no script. The two actresses tussle and rumble for real. Feel free to use your own opinions about he aggression, style of fighting, etc. of Diana and Suzy. You can also glean what you can from what you think the real fighting abilities of the actresses are shown in the video clip. Who forces her rival to either submit or renders her unconscious and how? Does Suzy Parker prevail or Diana Dors?

[byline]

You are an evil man barbosa. I think you are trying to get even with me. I had watched the fight video and had pretty much made up my mind of who to vote for in both parts of the poll. Then you came along and made some excellent points. Now I shall have to go back and watch the fight several more times. Oh the things I must suffer through to made the right choice.

If you keep making convincing arguments like this you may ruin your record of almost always voting for the loser of the poll. That in itself should tell me who to vote for.

[byline]

"  This time I have bet all my money, my house, my dog and my catfight drawings to Suzy. Until now it goes well. But I am afraid that when the blond mafia of forum “comes”… it’s all over! But this is my terror. If I am on winners’ side, I wouldn’t have reason to to growl and blame the others. And I can’t live without it… lol."

I haven't made up my mind yet but I may just have to vote for Diana no matter what I think just so you can continue to growl and blame others. You can thank me later. I really would hate to see you lose your dog though. lol

When I make up my mind and vote I will let you know my decisions and why.

P.S. I saw where someone said lol looked just like a person drowning.

[Warlock641]

Shouldn't it read Diana Dors proves Blondes are tougher IRL, not brunettes??  Just curious! LOL

[Glamour Fights]

Shouldn't it read Diana Dors proves Blondes are tougher IRL, not brunettes??  Just curious! LOL

Right you are but then Diana is a blonde.....

[byline]

Barbosa, I blame you for causing me to split my vote once again. I was all see to vote for Maxine and Diana to give Diana a sweep in the polls. Then I read you comments and went back and watched the video closely several times. I ended up voting for Angela in the movie fight and Diana in a real life fight. Here is my convoluted reasoning for each fight.

Angela vs. Maxine:
I usually go for the one I consider the more aggressive and the one who takes the fight to the other. As Barbosa pointed out this is Maxine as she first tackles Angela who is trying to run away from her. Then she goes after Angela as Angela seems to be trying to escape and run away near the end of the fight. If I understand the opening dialogue correctly it was Maxine who killed Alex Debbs, beating Angela to the punch. So she proved she had the moxie to carry what she started through. Besides, you have to love someone named Maxine - it just sounds like a fighter's name.  I did noticed that during the fight Angela always seemed to overcome Maxine's attack and usually had Maxine down more than Maxine did her. But I figured the fight would go on until finally the more aggressive Maxine would prevail as she wanted to kill Angela more than vice versa. What changed my vote was the ending of the fight. I hated the interference as much as Barbosa and would love to see the director and writers rot in hell. At the end of the fight Angela has Maxine down. We don't know how she got her there as the idiot director cut away from their fight and then cut back when she was on top. Maxine had managed to reverse before this so she might have done so again. But when the two idiots came over one of them lifted Angela off of Maxine. She was still feisty and obviously ready to continue fighting. On the other hand, Maxine seem to have trouble getting up even with help. And when she was constrained she looked as if she was done for anyway. So I figured the taller and probably stronger Angela had worn her down and she was close to losing anyway. Hence I give my vote to Angela.

Diana Dors vs. Suzy Parker:
My first bias here is that I think of Suzy as a spoiled pampered model. She was taller than Diana and I credit her with being stronger. In a fight like the one staged she would do well where the two women didn't really catfight as much as roll back and forth, trying to pin the other down. Suzy would most likely win such a fight against Diana as I think she was doing in the movie fight. But I see a real catfight taking place with lots of hairpulling, slapping and scratching. Suzy would be afraid of breaking a nail while I think Diana would really get into it - get done and dirty so to speak. I think Barbosa does what I once did and so did many others and that is unjustly malign Diana. She was a better actress that she was allowed to be. She was a good comedienne and a talented singer. Her talents were displayed on a TV show she had. I never saw the show at the time, only now on some Youtube clips. Given how she was put down a lot I think she was a real fighter to keep on and persevere. I doubt if Suzy even came close to her fighting spirit. Diana would whip her ass easily in my opinion.

[rawhide]

Diana Dors was in two other movie catfights -- "Diamond City" and "Berserk!".  As is usually the case, the idiot directors had both catfights broken up before there was a definite winner, although in "Berserk!" Diana appeared to be winning.  In "Diamond City" the catfight was the usual rolling around stuff, but in "Berserk!" there was a good deal of hairpulling and in the end, Diana slugs the brunette before they're completely separated.

I believe Diana would be scripted to win in the television catfight, but in real life I think a catfight between Diana and Suzy would be a long, serious, slapping and hairpulling affair.  Suzy would love to pull out as much of Diana's signature, bleached-blonde hair as she could and Diana would enjoy removing as much of Suzy's luxuriant brunette mane as possible.  In the end, I believe Suzy would triumph. 

[Glamour Fights]

Thanks, Rawhide, I know about the Berserk! fight but not about Diamond City.

[Vassago]

Well, if the movie catfight went the distance, I guess Maxine was destined to win. At handsight I thought Angela was wearing a long gown and therefore have hardly any chances against Maxine's outfit, but looks like her skirt was much shorter after all. Based on my experience from the 50s poll I guess rolling around on the ground isn't Diana's best way to dominate a catfight and until this one was interrupted it looked like Angela was getting the slight edge by pinning the blonde flat on her back. However if the case was reversed, then Diana would have little trouble with punching Suzy in the face and depriving her of any fighting spirit.

As far as real life goes, I guess most women hate the bleached blonde colour that Diana exposes regardless of their own and Suzy would be no exception. Suzy's hair color must be called auburn or hazel (brunette sounds very casual in her case) and I believe it's not only hair color that separates them. Diana has the presence of a glamour girl weary of her status while Suzy is almost a girl-next-door kind of woman. In a classic hairpulling affair Suzy's will to remove Diana's bleached hair prevails and the blonde submits while she still can salvage some pride. It would be equally epic for Suzy to challenge another 50s poll star, Joi Lansing in another hairpulling brawl to the finish.
   
Btw, Burke's Law was produced by Aaron Spelling and there's hardly any coincidence that this man was a catfight maniac long before his Dynasty & Melrose Place days already 

[Glamour Fights]

Diana Dors opponent in the 1949 movie, Diamond City, was none other than Honor Blackman.  Honor, a town resident, attacked Diana, a saloon girl, who was playing a piano.  The fight was indecisive with a spoil sport ending the fight by sprinkling pepper on both combatents.  Diana Dors was only 18 when the movie was filmed

Thanks! I finally got to see the fight. It could have been a really good fight of two fairly evenly matched fighters, at least as far as the characters were concerned. Unfortunately it didn't last long and too much time was spent on the woman sprinkling pepper on the fighters. I think the woman was the mother of Diana's character. Another possibly great fight ruined by the director and the screen writers.

[Glamour Fights]

Looks like barbosa is in danger of losing his reputation for picking the loser. He was with the voters in both cases.

The voting seemed to parallel the fight in the TV series in that Maxine took Angela down to get the early advantage. But she couldn't hold it and Angela reversed. It went back and forth for a little while but Angela eventually got Maxine down for good. Maxine couldn't escape and had no choice but to beg Angela to let her up. Angela was a little nasty and help her down while taunting her before letting her up. Barbosa seemed to describe the action to a tee and I liked byline's analysis of the end which seemed to show an exhausted Maxine with little fight left in her. Of course after being held she acted like she wanted to fight again but her heart didn't really seem in it.

For the other fight Diana made a good effort but the voters gave Suzy a narrow victory after a long and presumably nasty catfight. Personally I would have given the edge to Diana in a catfight but the voters have spoken and I can't disagree that Suzy would have a good chance of winning in real life.