[Vassago]

Summer break is over the 80s sex symbols are back for more vicious action!


CINDY MARGOLIS (Age: 24; 5'7.5" / 12th 8-5) vs ROSANNA ARQUETTE (Age: 30; 5'4.5" / 32nd 0-13)
After a hard-fought loss to Katherine Kelly Lang, Cindy Margolis comes back to challenge the bottom-ranked Rosanna Arquette. - It's about time I got in the mix for the biggest beatdown. Rosanna is such a weak girl, I'll have no trouble with knocking her out! However Rosanna believes Cindy's early run of success has finally came to an end and she will succumb under her strong grappling tactics. - I can't wait to turn her phoney boobs into one big mess!


AUDREY LANDERS (Age: 33; 5'3" / 16th 7-6) vs MEG RYAN (Age: 28; 5'8" / 11th 8-4-1)
Meg Ryan has dropped her innocent looks long time ago but some pundits still call her overrated. - It's about to change, Audrey might know one or two things about wrestling but I will fight dirty and use every trick in the book to put her away. She's not used to that kind of fighting so she will go down easily! However Audrey thinks Meg will regret those comments - She will be unable to do anything once I lay her flat on her back and facesit into submission! Everyone who calls her overrated have a good point!


VIRGINIA MADSEN (Age: 28; 5'5" / 21st 5-8) vs SHARON STONE (Age: 31; 5'8.5" / 1st 13-0)
The smile on Sharon Stone's face spells bad things for Virginia Madsen. - She's so weak I should be given a walkover in this round! After all I'm the leader, am I? Besides she's so fat and ugly I will take no pleasure in torturing her afterwards! What a waste of my precious time! However Virginia exposes her legs for no reason. - Sharon hasn't been trapped between such strong legs as mine so far! I will break in half both her and that unbeaten record she's so proud of!


KATHY IRELAND (Age: 26; 5'10" / 9th 9-3-1) vs EMMA SAMMS (Age: 29; 5'4" / 27th 1-12)
Cindy Margolis' call for the biggest beatdown has made Kathy Ireland angry. - Those blonde bitches are always wrong! If you're looking for some real ass-kicking just watch me destroy this useless piece of trash here! How's that new wig of yours, bitch? Should I try and rip it out? On the other side Emma Samms comes back to restore some pride after getting hairpulled to the extreme by Daryl Hannah - Those big whores always talk so much! I've had enough of this and will make her regret offending me!


DEMI MOORE (Age: 27; 5'5" / 15th 7-6) vs MARLA HEASLEY (Age: 30; 5'6" / 30th 1-12)
Two brunettes with vastly differing records. Demi Moore is on the way up, but still has been underperforming a lot in this competition. - This will change in this round, I reckon Marla will be knocked out in a matter of seconds. She would be better off not even trying to touch me because I will have no sympathy for her! Meanwhile Marla Heasley believes Demi's foul mouth will let her down again. - So far she's talked a lot about how strong she is, but she's barely won half the fights. Guess she's not that strong and merciless after all?


KATE CAPSHAW (Age: 36; 5'7" / 8th 10-3) vs CATHERINE OXENBERG (Age: 28; 5'5.5" / 13th 8-5)
This time two blondes going at each other with the fancy 80s hair style. Kate Capshaw still sits in the Top 10 and has pummelled her way through the competition above some expectations. Catherine Oxenberg has lost to Heather Thomas recently and now faces a bigger opponent - Kate is bigger then me, but it all counts for nothing when you apply the Philadelphia street tactics! I will send her to a wig master once I rip all her curly locks! Kate only smiles back and promises to send Catherine back for a new wig herself instead - So much talk about my hair but she'll be the one choking out her strands once I'm finished with her! 


KATHLEEN TURNER (Age: 35; 5'8" / 3rd 13-0) vs SAMANTHA FOX (Age: 23; 5'1" / 18th 6-7)
Third-ranked Kathleen Turner has welcomed Samantha Fox on a luxury sofa - I don't think this small bitch will have anything against me! She's just about teh right size for me to kick her all over the place. I see she's already crawling at my feet! That's the right attitude! However Samantha belives she's got a surprise in store for Turner - She's much taller but not as flexible as me. Once I drag her off that sofa, she'll be in trouble cause she can't fight on the ground. After I beay her, I'll take that sofa for my personal pleasures!


BROOKE SHIELDS (Age: 24; 6'0" / 23rd 3-10) vs DONNA DIXON (Age: 32; 5'9" / 2nd 13-0)
Both these women expose their legs in order to intimidate each other. Brooke Shields believes she's got much stronger legs and Donna Dixon will be crushed between them - I can't understand why she still hasn't lost a single fight. She's so overrated it's amost laughable. But I will break her record in this round! On the other hand Donna Dixon thinks she will easily maintain her perfect record - It's very simple, really. Brooke won't be able to use her skinny legs because I will headlock her into submission instead. My legs are equally strong as hers but I actually know how to fight rather then talk about it!

[Vassago]

Jessica Lange awaits the winner of this competition. She said she's not going to bother fighting all those scrubs 

[Glamour Fights]

Happy days are here again.
The skies are bright and clear again.
So let’s sing a song of cheer again.
Happy days are here again.
I was afraid these tournaments had go away. Thrilled, overjoyed, ecstatic, etc. they are back. You get the picture. Time to get fingers and motion and make some comments and predictions.

Cindy Margolis vs Rosanna Arquette: The combination of Cindy having what she considers an embarrassing lost to Katherine Kelly Land and the fact that she is just tougher than Rosanna means that this will be an easy fight for Cindy. But sorry, Cindy, you won’t be in the mix for the biggest beatdown.

Audrey Landers vs Meg Ryan: This was a tough choice to make. Meg has surprised many by how dirty she fights. Audrey has been learning from her sister Judy how to wrestle better and better as the fights go on. A close fight that turns in Audrey’s favor when the sweet Audrey decides to fight as dirty as Meg. She recalls a bad girl role she had in Charlie’s Angels and uses that to inspire her dirty tactics.

Virginia Madsen vs Sharon Stone: Virginia’s legs look much stronger than Sharon’s but that doesn’t phase Sharon. She has beaten women with stronger legs. Sharon is the leader for a good reason. She can catfight, slug it out, or turn on turn the fight into a sex fight if she starts losing. She will have to use her catfighting and sexual prowess to avoid Virginia’s legs and get the win. But it won’t be easy even if she is the current leader. I predict she will b overtaken this round.

Kathy Ireland vs Emma Samms: The tall, strong, athletic, Sports Illustrated model is on the money when she says her chances of getting the biggest beatdown are better than Cindy Margolis’ chances. Emma is not in Cindy’s league to begin with and she is still suffering from her beating by Daryl Hannah. I think this will be the biggest beatdown with perhaps only Kathleen Turner challenging.

Demi Moore vs Marla Heasley: I predict an upset in this fight. It is Demi’s foul mouth that is her undoing. Pissed off at the disrespect Demi has shown her Marla starts off with a vicious high kick to Demi’s mouth knocking out some teeth. Demi fights back but never recovers enough to overcome Marla who continues to smash her in the mouth. “That ought to shut you up!”

Kate Capshaw vs Catherine Oxenberg: Kate is bigger than Catherine and has the better record. That brings out the Philadelphia street fighter in Catherine even though she was from the upper society in Philly. Hey, an upper class in Philly is more street fighter than street fighters in a lot of other cities. Catherine comes out She comes out full of fury and aggression and overwhelms Kate right from the start. It is an easier victory than even Catherine expects but not in the biggest beatdown category.

Kathleen Turner vs Samantha Fox: I see this fight as the biggest candidate to take the beatdown title this round away from Kathy Ireland. Kathleen wants to jump over Donna Dixon in the standings and maybe even catch Sharon Stone or at least close the distance. Even though Sam has had boxing training she can’t hit as hard as Kathleen. And if she thinks Kathleen can’t fight ion the ground she is dead wrong. Hell, Kathleen can even fight in mud as seen in Undercover Blues against the big tough Fiona Shaw. {See my current avatar. I must do a poll fight about  this pair sometime.} Katherine uses Sam’s big bazoongas as punching speed bags to hone her boxing skills. Sam’s prodigious boobs take a beating and she can’t even reach Kathleen.

Brooke Shields vs Donna Dixon: Donna wants to move up closer to Sharon (“how can a skinny bitch like that be leading”) and stay ahead of Kathleen Turner. It ain’t gonna happen as I see Donna falling below Kathleen. Brooke doesn’t have the greatest record but she has the size to give Donna a good battle. The fight will not be the blow out their records suggest but it will be a comfortable win for Donna. Donna has the size, muscles, and athleticism to be a contender for the title. You heard it here but I still favor Kathleen Turner to take it all. Yep, that’s right Vassago, I like Lydia but she isn’t in the top

[byline]

Welcome back Vassago and welcome back to your tournaments. Hope to see the 70s restart soon.

Cindy Margolis beats Rosanna Arquette.
Cindy Margolis gets the better of Rosanna Arquette but it is not an easy victory. Cindy has lost a little confidence losing to Katherine Kelly Lang and is ripe to lose to Rosanna. Too bad Rosanna won’t get her virgin win for Cindy has enough confidence left to rip her hair out.

Audrey Landers beaten by Meg Ryan
I disagree with Glamour Fights and agree with Meg Ryan. Her dirty tactics will keep Audrey Landers off balance. Meg has beaten tougher women than Audrey and her claws will be out full force as she gets shreds Audrey apart in a fairly easy win.

Virginia Madsen beaten by Sharon Stone
Sharon Stone wins with a new tactic. Virginia Madsen is flashing her legs and Sharon looks upon that as a challenge. She gets Virginia down on her back, spreads her legs in a grapevine with her longer legs and grinds her pelvis away on Virginia’s. Virginia is in pain and arousal at the same time. Confused she lies there and takes it as Sharon grinds her whole body on Virginia’s.

Kathy Ireland beats Emma Samms.
Have to agree with GF on this fight. Kathy Ireland is just too big, too strong, and too skilled for Emma Samms. She scoffs at Cindy Margolis/ claim for the biggest beat down and will be going for that. In nothing else she wants to beat Emma worse than Cindy beats Rosanna and there will be little the hapless Emma can do to stop hr.

Demi Moore beats Marla Heasley.
Sick of hearing she has been under performing Demi Moore has added anger to her toughness. She is truly on the way up having finally moved into a winning record. Marla Heasley may try and look tough with her hands on her hips but she has no weapons to counter such a motivated and angry Demi. Look for Demi to go for a big win, maybe even the biggest this round.

Kate Capshaw beats Catherine Oxenberg.
The sophisticated Catherine Oxenberg tries to scare her opponents by claiming she is a product of the Philly street fight scene. Kate Capshaw just laughs in her face. That isn’t the only thing she delivers to Catherine’s face. This becomes a fierce battle as the two go at it. A close fight but in the end Catherine ends up with two black eyes, a bloody nose, and a split lip. Catherine tries to use her nails to scratch out Kate’s eyes but Kate’s punches prove too much for her.

Kathleen Turner beats Samantha Fox.
Kathleen Turner has too much physical presence for the wide bodied but diminutive Samantha Fox. Samantha may know how to throw punches but you can’t really do that when you are being thrown around. Kathleen has her way with Samantha with the only question being can she beat up Sam bad enough to get the biggest beatdown or will Sam give up too quickly.

Brooke Shields beats Donna Dixon.
I predict an upset in this fight contrary to what their records would suggest. Donna Dixon is used to using her size and solid body to dominate and outmuscle her opponents. Once again, contrary to what Barbosa says, Brooke Shields is not weak. Plus she has the height on Donna and has just a solid body. Her strengths match up well against Donna’s. Donna is not used to fighting opponents bigger and maybe even stronger than her and doesn’t have a good backup plan. It is a long, tough, fight, perhaps the longest and toughest of this set. I think it is the most evenly matched fight but I like Brooke to take Donna in the end.

[Vassago]

Round 14 is over and here are the results. Once again thanks for all the expert comments and votes! 

Cindy Margolis (71) vs Rosanna Arquette (38)
None of the experts gave Rosanna Arquette much chance against Cindy Margolis and the fight went according to script. Cindy was just too powerful and vicious for Rosanna to handle and knocked her out fairly easy. Cindy was probably too bored with the lack of challenge as she didn't quite chase the biggest beatdown award this time around.

Audrey Landers (58) vs Meg Ryan (52)
This was one of the closest fight of the entire round, Meg doing all her best to scratch Audrey's eyes out and despite Audrey having her pretty face messed up badly she managed to drag Meg on teh floor where she wrapped her legs around Meg's neck and squeezed out the submission. Meg fumed she was the better looking woman after the fight, but the artistic impressions count for little once you've tapped out your surrender. Meg has won most of the close fights that were decided by single votes, but she had to swallow a bitter pill with Audrey's wrestling baclground proving superior.

Virginia Madsen (47) vs Sharon Stone (64)
The overall leader overcame a strong challenge from Virginia Madsen who fought hard on the ground, but Sharon applied the grapevine pin to secure her 14th victory. Virginia was doing great at the beginning, but Sharon's strenght gave her the edge as the time went by and allowed her to work over Virginia in the decissive moments. Still, Sharon was nowhere near the beatdown award for this round, a credit to Virginia's resistance in this fight.

Kathy Ireland (67) vs Emma Samms (43)
A very brave fight from Emma Samms but Kathy Ireland accepted the vicious slugfest she had been offered, withstood it all and dished out some punishment on her own. Emma's punches made some in-roads early on, but then Kathy grabbed Emma by the hair, yanked her forwards to expose Emma's back and started pounding her from the back. Emma was trying to grab Kathy's knees and force her off teh feet, but Kathy kicked her in the crotch instead and Emma crumbled on her kness where she was an easy victim to the towering model. Few more punches to the back of the head and Emma had enough of this fight and gave up.

Demi Moore (74) vs Marla Heasley (35)
Glamour Fights' upset detector must have run into some trouble, cause Demi Moore thoroughly beat up Marla Heasley in a convincing manner. This was as one-sided as it gets with Marla being brutalized by Demi from start to finish. One may wonder whether this will kick start Demi's challenge into the Top 10 or is just a consequence of Marla's very weak showing in this fight alone.

Kate Capshaw (52) vs Catherine Oxenberg (59)
The tide has turned on Glamour Fights in this one, as everyone else believed Kate will make a mess of Catherine's street fighting tactics. In fact, Kate was surprised herself by how vicious Catherine can be despite her sophisticated looks as realisticman called it (has she been taking lessons from Meg Ryan on how to make your opponent look foolish by making a false judgement? ) and when Catherine yanked more and more of Kate's hair out, is started to get really bad for the older blonde. Her punches didn't hurt Catherine as much as at the start of the fight and finally Catherine tripped Kate over and shoved her down the dumpster nose first where Kate took a hard landing and couldn't get up anymore.

Kathleen Turner (72) vs Samantha Fox (36)
No surprise over here as Kathleen Turner clearly pummelled Samantha Fox into submission. Kathleen's longer reach and hard blows proved way too much for the younger singer to handle and when Kathleen buried her nails in Sam's famous boobs, it was all over. Kathleen easily forced Sam on teh ground where she continued to brutalize her until Sam begged for mercy. Kathleen kicked the hapless singer away and went back to her couch while Samantha had to crawl away sour and humiliated,

Brooke Shields (45) vs Donna Dixon (65)
The experts were dead split on this one as Brooke gave Donna quite a struggle early on, however the blonde proved more skillful, escaped the brunette's headlock and applied one on her own. Brooke tried everything she could to break it off, even managed to stand up on her feet with Donna's thighs firmly locked around her neck, but she just couldn't force the blonde to let it go and crumbled on the ground again. She refused to submit until she had enough air in her lungs, but finally run out of steam and tapped out with Donna showing her little sympathy afterwards