We had considered doing a rematch since the last video has sold rather well, in-fact it was Dana's best selling video. I also got praise for taking a beating, but some weirdos claimed that I was a terrible jobber because of facial expressions or some stuff. Some of Dana's colleagues even asked to borrow me for some videos but I shot that down rather quickly. It comes down to trust. Dana used to be a professional wrestler and that job requires a lot of trust between the competitors. I wasn't interested in working with somebody who talks a big game but might be incredibly sloppy or reckless. Dana knows how to execute these moves and I feel like she would never try anything funny with me. Also, I had done this to help a friend and it had sparked a certain kinship between us.
The big problem was that we couldn't come up with an idea to save our lives. I could face an opponent of her choosing, but the problem came down to finding an opponent we could trust. Who'd be willing to do the job in a scripted video and not have some temper tantrum or try something. We could flip the script and I could sic a wrestler on an injured Dana, pulling off a double turn. We went through every idea conceivable and every single time we ran into a brick wall. The cost was another problem, we could only haggle so much or try to get a discount and get a female wrestler to fly out to a small Midwestern town.
Finally, I had an epiphany.
Go back to what worked.
I would suit up, taking another pounding from Dana, but this time we were doing it in a hotel room and I'd be taking the brunt of my punishment on a bed. I could safely bump on a bed, it'd still look devastating. We found a hotel by the airport, nothing fancy but this was the off season so we had empty rooms on both sides. The plot would be simple, I'd hire a wrestler to work an exhibition match, they'd show up wearing a mask and of course Dana would be under the mask. Dana would catch me with a big strike and we'd be off to the races. We scripted the entire match and did a quick run-through when my dad wasn't around. I felt comfortable taking some bigger moves this time.
A demolition derby or slams, suplexes, bombs and submissions.
The day came as we prepped the room, the same mats that I had bee slammed on mercilessly would cover the floor. I took a couple of test bumps on the bed and while I'd still feel an impact, it was far less than the thin mats. Dana showed me her outfit, she'd start off wearing a GI and a menacing lucha libre/ kabuki mask hybrid. After I was down on the mats, Dana would strip to a revealing fishnet bodysuit, obviously covering up her private parts. It certainly added an air of menace and showed off her still toned body for a lady her age. I would upgrade from the GI to the short/shirt/socks combo, pretty basic combo for any male wrestler. We actually had a cameraman this time and it was the same guy that I had barged in on Dana beating up a while back.
It's a small world.
I entered the frame first, stretching and waiting for me opponent to enter the room. Dana entered, wearing an intimidating black gi and mask combo, staring me down the entire down.
"Can I see whose under the mask?" I said jokingly as I reached for the mask for Dana to only swat it away.
Dana responded with a growl as we faced off, arms on shoulders. Right away, Dana slammed her straight into the stomach and I insisted on taking this blow full force. I didn't try to lesson the blow by firming my stomach as I crumpled to the floor, not expecting the impact. Breathing became labored, my face turned about as red as a radish as I curled into a ball. Dana walked around me, taunting me to get back up in a gruff voice, trying to mask hers. Eventually, Dana hauled me to my feet and sent me down to the mats with a vicious hip throw, enough to snap me back to reality.
Dana walked off camera and came back with the white belt that she had taken from me in the previous video. She dangled it in-front of me and menacingly asked me if I remembered this. Dana wrapped it around my throat and began to squeeze away as I reached out to desperately but quickly "passed out" from the hold. Dana rolled me onto my stomach and disrobed into her new gear, tossing her mask off screen. She still held the white belt and *WHIP*, I suddenly woken up by a light smack from the belt. It looked vicious but I didn't feel that match pain but I let out a horrendous scream. Dana did it a few more times before tossing the belt off screen. I got back up and I faced off with this demon from past, my face was a mix of shock and horror.
"Remember me, Karate boy?" Dana asked as she clotheslined me onto the bed. The camera man followed as he filmed Dana dropping a leg on my throat, making it look like she had connected but she barely grazed me. I still sold it as Dana dragged me to my feet, grabbing onto my hair.
"Stare into these eyes. Lost time, I broke your body but I didn't break your spirit. Tonight, I break that," Dana said as she snap mare'd me. She backed up to one end, and did a running head snap, sending me head into the bed. Dana smiled as she grabbed my legs and dropped her right onto my crotch, again protecting me but I sold it with a wide eyes and holding my crotch. Dana was right on the attack, and locking in a vicious mounted figure-four headscissors, forcing me to submit right away. This was no holds barred apparently as Dana refused to let go, leaving me in absolute agony until I went limp. Dana grabbed my hand, and dropped it once, twice and...
"Will we see a rally, folks?" Dana asked sarcastically as my hand flailed to the floor as Dana shrugged and let go. Dana kept the hold on until I twitched a bit. "What should I do next to him?" Dana asked the camera as she dragged me up, I was basically a ragdoll but Dana had went above and beyond to protect me.
"Let's wake him up, shall we?" Dana asked to the camera just as I had opened my eyes. I still on dream street as she scooped me up and dropped me onto the bed with a brutal sidewalk slam. I yelled out "shit" and moved onto my side, holding my back. Dana forced me onto my back and pinned me, but she raised my shoulder. Dana forced me back up, scooped me up and faked me out a few times as she walked me around the room, before viciously dropping me across her back. I felt the brunt a bit but it wasn't as hash as I thought it would be. I arched my back up, holding it as Dana stood over me, cackling like a maniac.
Dana grabbed my legs and teaser another headbutt to my crotch but instead wrapped my legs up in the diabolical figure four leg lock. As Dana wrenched on my knee and shin with the hold, so she sat up to apply pressure and eventually added even more pressure by lifting herself off the floor as I writhed in pain. Dana even bit my toes just to be even more of a nasty heel than last time.
"I'm not letting go till I hear that meniscus pop and tear or you tap. Be lucky that I'm in a merciful mood" Dana said as I futility tried to roll myself over to reverse the pressure but I finally tapped out on the bed, but Dana rose even further, turning the hold into a Figure Eight, forcing me to frantically tap.
I wore a mask of pain as Dana kept the hold on for nearly a minute, letting my cries of agony echo throughout the room. Dana finally let go and crawled over and made a mocking cry face as she got back up and started to taunt me to get back up. I did and was right away slapped into the dreaded abdominal stretch as Dana began to violently wrench my body at an unnatural angle. It was one of the first major submission from the first match we had used and we had wanted to keep it that way. This was more of a way to show off Dana's pro style cruelty than breaking out the same submissions we had used last time. Dana sensually licked her hand, ready to smack my ribs, to add insult to injury but instead just ruffled my hair. Instead, Dana looped my hand through my legs, lifted me and slammed me to the bed with a vicious pump handle slam. This one took the air out of me and instead of selling, I just laid there for a moment, trying to get my bearings. I could see a hint of panic in Dana's eyes but I responded with a quick wink to reassure her. Dana improvised and put her foot on my chest, and flex a bit and called out a pin but took her foot off after the two count.
I finally rose, trying to use Dana to help me as she shrugged to the camera. I had left my back open for some clubbing blows that sent me to one knee. Dana hooked me in a front-face lock, dragged me to the middle of the bed, and executed a perfect and violent looking snap suplex, but kept the hold on and rolled me around for another snap suplex, followed by one more, each move taking more and more of my spirit, before she tried one more. I blocked it by putting my foot behind her ankle to stop it. That elicited a growl from Dana who ended any type of rally by smashing her fist into my stomach. Dana teased suplexing me off the bed which is an insane idea that I pitched that elicited the "You gotta be kidding me" look. Dana finally lifted me high for a normal suplex, leaving me up in the air, letting the blood flow to my head. Finally, she dropped me with the most violent variation of the suplex, the dreaded brain-buster. Which is basically the amalgamation off a normal suplex and a DDT. Dana nailed it and I sat up, may eyes looking like those cartoon eyes that would display KO on it. I finally fell back down to the floor, knocked out as Dana rolled me off the bed.
"Two knockouts, time for the grand finale of pro-style mayhem!" Dana said excitedly.
I was positioned perfectly, as Dana walked to the edge of the bed and came right off it with a splash that barely hurt. But the camera made it look like Andre the Giant had just dropped an elbow on me and I certainly sold it that way. I held my stomach, breathing heavily as Dana stood over me, smiling. Dana grabbed my hair and dragged me over to the wall, and forced me against it. I tried to bail but Dana pinned me to the wall by extended her foot out, the visual of her fishnet clad leg pinning me back made for quite the visual.
"Wanna see how a real fight does some martial arts, dojo boy?" Dana said by snapping off a high kick to the side of my head. Her foot barely grazed but I went down like a took a cannonball to the chest. Dana dragged me back onto the bed.
"What move should I start with?" Dana asked me, but I did have much of a response. "Scoop slam it is!" Dana said.
Dana scooped me up and slammed me onto the bed, picked me up and slammed me down on the bed once more and finally did it one more time. Around this time. The adrenaline kicked in so I really wasn't feeling any type of pain. I got back up and actually put up my dukes which resulted in laughter as Dana raked my eyes and scooped me on my shoulders for a vicious human torture rack. There was no way to hide taking this move, I'd feel every moment of it, even if Dana was applying little pressure. Dana walked me around the round, displaying me like a prized beef carcass that she was about to butcher. Dana wrenched and wrenched on me as the pain shot up and down my spinal cord. I flailed my arms as she continued to use as a human accordion. I feebly tried to tap but Dana had no interest in letting go and suddenly dropped to her knees and I felt a jolt of pain. Dana let go as I slid off her back and onto the bed, but Dana had more plans for me. Dana picked me up and "rammed" me into the padded headboard twice, as I felt to my knees as Dana signaled for the dreaded Iron Claw.
The Iron Claw sounds goofy and it was one of those moves I would always roll me eyes at when I'd see it. Especially when the wrestler would inexplicably bleed from taking the hold. When done right and with violent intent, it can actually do some real damage and I found this out when I asked Dana to put me in it one time. While it didn't knock me out, it did cause a nice amount of pain that'll give you a headache. Luckily, Dana was doing it the safe way as I kicked my legs up and drastically tried to rip her hand off my head. Dana finally let go after I looked close to passing out, but Dana was intent on keeping me conscious until her grand finale. I did the Hogan convulsion sell to put over the effect of her devastating claw hold. Dana wasn't done and busted out an old move, the hangman as we went back-to-back and Dana lifted me by the chin and wrenched my neck over her shoulder. It showed strong she was as I only being held up by her hands, looking absolutely pathetic at this point as my legs were off the ground. Right before I was ready to pass out, Dana brought me down, but kept in the hold and snapped me back to reality with a vicious neck breaker, my head bouncing off the bed for the umpteenth time in this match. It could have been worse at this point, Dana could have done a sit-out neck breaker aka The Rude Awakening. Dana had thoroughly tenderized my back and so what could come next? The Goddamn Rude Awakening.
Dana even did gyrated her hips a bit before she sit down and jammed my neck straight into her shoulders. She even did the Rick Rude hip taunt and flicked imaginary sweat into the camera. I was holding my neck in pain, unaware of what Dana had planned next. Dana had a hold of my legs, stepped between and flipped me over in the dreaded Scorpion Deathlock/Sharpshooter/Who cares the move fucking hurts. As Dana got as low as humanly possible, I could feel my lower back on the brink of imploding. Alright, I'm being a touch over-dramatic but this one was really screwing me up and I did one hard tap. Hard tap was code for this one was really doing some damage, so get off me as quickly as possible. We had maybe two moves left until the grand finale. Dana backed off a bit but I was fine, the adrenaline had worn off and I had panicked. I finally got back up and approached Dana but she was quick to get behind me, and get her hands around my waist. I knew what was coming.
The German Suplex.
Dana teased me by lifting me off the ground and putting me back on my feet. I prepared myself mentally for taking this move and after sufficient teasing, Dana suplexed me onto the mattress, no bridge though because that'd end my suffering. I folded over to sell the impact of the move as even Dana silently giggled at my sell job. I was playing dead weight for Dana as she had to dead-lift me off the floor, I scratched her hand to signal that everything was alright. She forced me up close and personal and we both knew what was happening. My eyes, on camera wore an expression that told her to just put me out of my misery and she would gladly do so. I would love to say that I had one last act of defiance, but I really didn't have one in me. I had been thoroughly dissected, beaten, slammed, wrenched, racked, suplexed, and scissored into a pile of putty. Go home time. I stared into her eyes, part mama bird and part destroyer as she placed me between her legs and lifted me for the dreaded piledriver. Dana walked me around the room a bit, like we were in a sold out stadium and she was showing me off for the bloodthirsty crowd. The blood was rushing to my head and the camera guy got a great shot of my face at this point. I wore this twist mask of agony, fear and acceptance that this was my fate.
He finally panned out as Dana kicked her legs and sent me head-first into the bed. Alright, her legs took most of the brunt but from way it was filmed, it looked like I took all the impact. I scratched her foot to signal that I was fine, something that she had insisted I had to. I was out though, my work was done as Dana rolled me over and placed her fishnet-covered foot on my right cheek. Dana flexed to the camera and counted me out, this time it was a time count to be even more of a bastard. The camera guy signaled we were good and finished filming. I was slow to rise and even I admit that I had taken a good thrashing in this one, we had raised the stakes in this one. The practice though had paid off as Dana helped me up to my feet. Dana had snapped out of wrestler mode right away and was now more concerned about my well being. We embraced in a hug and I got a peck on the cheek she had just used for a footrest.
"This place has a hot tub, right?" I asked as Dana nodded yes.
We were both drained physically and emotionally as we plopped down onto some chairs. The camera guy brought us some ice cold water and some towels to wipe off the sweat. We didn't have any air conditioner on, since it would mess with the audio and we had spent about thirty solid minutes in combat. Right away, Dana flipped on the air conditioner and the cool breeze gave me goosebumps on my body.
"Well, I'm never this again, I feel like this thing is stuck to me. I'm gonna have to peel it off before I shower," Dana said with a laugh.
"Hey, you picked it. I presume that wrestling singlet wouldn't be feeling any better," I said with a smile.
"True, but last time I didn't have to throw you around for most of the match," Dana said with a wink.
"Hot tub?" I asked.
"Hot tub, indeed."
We had some Bayer back and body on hand to take after a nice soak in the hot-tub. Before any of you pervs think that something happened, it didn't. Dana packed up her stuff and we embraced after such a battle. I had the room to myself for the night. I'd love to say that we had another battle, maybe one that saw me rally and finally defeat her, but it never happened. That was the last video I filmed, it sold a ton of copies and Dana gave five hundred dollars for my work. I was shocked but she had insisted on giving me some type of payoff. I went to work in my dad's pharmacy and started to learn the trade so I could take over one day. Getting my pharmacy licence would open up a ton of doors for me. Dana was my neighbor for a few more years until she got a gig with a large firm downtown, she moved a bit closer since the commute from Cudahy was quite a long one. We still text and meet up every once and a while, and I can say that she is a close friend of mine.
But many of my close friends have never suplexed me though.
That's how you know that you have a good friend.
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