Larry Foxton is one of the few men regularly invited to the club. Larry has been around a long time and helped set the place up with Maggie, Jay and the other girls. He’s drifted in and out over the years and played a bit part in publicising the club. One thing he gets to do is interview the fighters for the club’s newsletter, which he produces. He had arranged to interview Ellen immediately after her title match with Christine. Here is the transcript of his interview.
I’m in a place the girls call ‘the chill out zone’. It’s a private area between the red and blue corner dressing rooms that can only be access from them or via a spiral stair case from above. It’s furnished with soft couches and there is a mini-bar and drink making facilities here. There’s also a one-way glass window that looks out to the ring. The girls can sit here and relax before and after their fights.
Ellen comes down the stair case from the edit room above, where she’s been watching rushes of the last few minutes of her fight with Christine, which ended less and an hour ago. She’s wearing only a silk kimono and a pair of black high cut hipster briefs with large white polka dots. She’s fresh from the shower and her hair is still wet. Despite the beating she’s just taken she has a big grin on her face as she sits down carefully, allowing the kimono to fall open slight exposing her cleavage, and picks up the glass of chilled white wine I’ve put on the table for her.
Cheers! Please excuse the knickers but I seem to have lost my other pants.
I’ve got to say that for a middle-aged woman who’s just had the crap kicked out of her you’re looking great tonight.
Thank you, honey – I did manage to get a little crap kicking in myself you know, just not enough (she sighs).
How are you feeling?
Like I’ve been in a fight, strangely enough, and lost it.
How much of it do you remember?
Most of it actually, but very little about the last couple of minutes or leaving the ring.
You needed a little help…
Thank you, I know that, I’ve just been watching the play back.
Talk us through it, what went wrong?
What went wrong?! Just about everything from the opening bell! (ruefully) That bitch stole my pants.
You’re not the first, she’s stolen them from Jay and Gabi and Suzi as well, possibly others too – she’s got quite a collection now.
Is that supposed to make me feel better? Knowing she’s a pervey little lezzie who beats you up and nicks your knickers?
Sorry, let’s get back to the fight, better still let’s look back on your year. You’ve been out of the game for over 12 years, why come back now?
Why not? I’m 47 so this is probably my last chance to have a bit of physical contact fun before it starts to hurt too much. And it is fun, I’d forgotten how much fun it is. Also, times are hard – every little helps.
Do you regret retiring when you did?
Not at all, there were some tough opponents around then; Suzi, Gabi, Christine and Leah to name just four. I lost to Jay but she still retired. Whatever she might claim, Jay was past her best when I lost to her and later, I realised I was too. After losing to Jay I lost to Gabi and Christine as well. I kept going for a bit, I managed to beat Clare and Christine but after I lost to Gabi again I decided to call it a day
But that was a very close match – it could have gone either way.
Could have done but didn’t – I lost so I quit. Jay won and she still quit because she knew she’d probably lose against Gabi or Christine. I quit because I couldn’t beat Gabi.
So, 12 years later you got back in the ring to face a woman, a former champion, who didn’t even fight her first match until after you retired – how did you feel about that?
Nervous, of course, but, with only two title wins to her credit, Rachel was clearly the weakest of the group so I was also relieved by the draw.
Did you do much training? I’m assuming you didn’t just jump back in after so long away?
Yes, I did some. We had a few weeks to prepare before the first round of the tournament. I’d always worked out fairly regularly but I upped my routine and toned up a bit. I also sparred a bit with Clare and Suzi, just to remind myself how to fall properly. In wrestling it’s as much about avoiding getting hurt yourself as it is about hurting your opponent.
Do you have a coach?
No, not at the moment, but there’s always people willing to give you advice and critique you. We have two months between each bout so there’s plenty of time for training. I’ve been sparring with some of the younger girls. They’re more flexible and agile than me but I usually have 20lbs on them which helps to even things out a bit. (She chuckles)
Talk us through your match with Rachel.
What can I say? It started badly for me but got better as it went on. I lost the first two falls but then I found her weak spot and never looked back.
Of course, you’re fighting with new rules now – 20 minutes, most falls wins rather than the old best of 5 over 8 or 10 rounds. How do you find that?
It took a little getting used to and it goes some way to explaining that bad start. She got the first fall after nearly 6 minutes and I’d never fought for more than 3 minutes without a break before so I was tired. I do like the idea of unlimited falls though. Under the 5 falls system you tended to be very cautious if you went one or two behind and that meant you didn’t take chances to try and claw one back.
Unless you were Jay of course
True – she made a habit of winning 3-2 after going 0-2 down but it never worked for me. I only came from behind to win half a dozen times in over 40 matches – I definitely needed first to draw first blood if I was going to win
I can see why you were worried against Rachel then.
Yes but, like I said, once I remembered that all I had to do was get more falls than her I knew I could win. I may have been a bit rusty but it soon came back. Plus, I had a size advantage. Don’t forget I took four falls off her in 8 minutes in that fight.
Next you took on Gabi
She’s a tough old bird and it was quite physical all the way through. Knocking her out was a great boost to me as I’d only faced her three times before and she’d beaten me hollow on two of those occasions. The only time I came close was our last fight. I lost and that’s why I quit – I just couldn’t beat her.
Then there was…can I say the C word?
Bitch – she made my pussy ache for weeks. I really thought I had her too. When I was 5-2 up with 5 minutes to go, I was just thinking “hang on in there girl, you’ve got in the bag”. Of course, then she started knocking seven bells out of my ‘down belows’ and three minutes later I couldn’t have got up if I wanted to.
It wasn’t a true knock out though was it? I mean you were still conscious, weren’t you?
Yes, but by god I wished I wasn’t. You can’t imagine how much it hurts to have someone smash you love box to bits, even at my age with extra padding in that department.
Your next match was against Clare – what happened there?
It was a close run thing. We’d fought many times before and we’re very evenly matched. I was convinced it was going to be a draw. Even when she went ahead with 2 minutes to go I was thinking, no problem I’ll get it back…but of course I didn’t. I would have done too, a few more seconds would have done it but I just ran out of time (sigh).
You were very gracious in defeat
Of course, she’s a great opponent and it was a great fight. Despite losing I really enjoyed it. Not as much as I would have done if I’d won but it was good. Also, she’s such a sweetie, I’m really never sorry to lose to her.
I guess that’s an important point – how do you fight someone you like?
It’s not easy but we all do it. Many of us are actually quite close but we blank it out in the ring. It’s easier to get angry with someone you don’t like, in my case Gabi or the bitch, than someone you like, such as Clare or Suzi.
Speaking of which, going into the last round of the tournament you were in contention for a final place but as the evening went on how did you feel?
I knew I had to beat Suzi and when Christine and Gabi both got KO’s I knew I had to do more than just win – I needed to win by at least three falls, not easy against Suzi. All she needed to do was win.
But it didn’t exactly go her way did it?
No, I think she was surprised when I took the first fall so quickly, just 2 minutes, and even more surprised that she couldn’t equalise. 15 minutes in I think she realised that, at 2-0 down, she wasn’t going to win on falls so she went for the knockout move. I needed at least one more fall and I guess that when she started the charge I thought what the heck, if we’re both down I might have a chance to pin her for the 3rd fall. When we did collide it was far harder than I’d counted on. I was aiming for a body check but, despite the boob cushion, our heads cracked together and we were both on our backs seeing stars. I did my best to get up but I figured it was game over. I couldn’t see straight and I felt sick. I heard Jay counting and I was sure the count was just for me. I crawled to the ropes and dragged myself up but all the time I was thinking: she’s younger and better padded than me, the moment I get to my feet she’ll be on my back looking to finish me off. But she wasn’t, she was still out cold.
All of which brings us back to tonight
What can I say? Things started badly and got worse. I was always the underdog here and I probably went into the match half expecting to lose.
How can you say that? You had equal tournament points and you had a big lead on fall aggregate.
Yes, but she was the only one not to be KO’d in the tournament and she had KO’d me. Also she’s much more experienced and has been fighting much more recently than me. You know she’s beaten me 8 times now, I’ve only got the better of her once.
So, you were cautious at the start and she took advantage?
Yeah, pinned in 45 seconds, it wasn’t a great start and what she did next was just plain insulting.
Pulling your pants off you mean?
Yeah, like anyone wants to see my bum these days! Then she wouldn’t give them back and when she did, I didn’t get a chance to put them back on before she jumped me again.
And the second pin pushed you over the edge?
Of course it did – how often do you see someone go two falls down inside a minute? And, like I said, I don’t want my naked ass and pussy on display to the world. To be honest I half expected to be disqualified when I went after her with my pants – I guess a bout that ended with me being disqualified in my first move wouldn’t have gone down well.
You were pretty mad by then…
Yes, but not mad enough – I was naked and, at my age, I don’t want to be showing everything so I was mad having my bum and pussy on full display. The red mist came down and I attacked her but when it lifted, she was able to get me back. I should have hit her harder.
So, there you were, three falls down after 90 seconds, how do you get back into the match after that?
Clearly I didn’t. Sure, we settled down after that but she got the fourth fall inside 5 minutes and I think I lost hope at that point
But you took the next two falls…
Perhaps ‘lost hope’ was a bit unfair, I did what I could to try and get back into it but each fall was draining me more than it seemed to drain her – like I said earlier, she has experience on her side.
You pinned her in the 8th minute and again in the 12th and it looked like you were making a comeback until she got your arms behind you in the 14th minute. What happened then?
You know damned well, then she took me apart with that surf board. You know I’ve only been caught that way twice in all my matches – both times by that bitch.
What exactly happened? Talk us through it.
It started after I’d tried to get another pin and she managed to buck me off. As we came off the mat she grabbed my wrists, then she hooked my arms behind me and pulled back. That hurts a lot and it hurt more when she put a foot in my back. She forced me to my knees…
And then?
What happened next was text book. I’ve seen the replay and I can’t fault it. The way she hooked her legs around mine and pulled back…god it hurt! After that it’s all a bit of a blur I’m afraid.
But you’ve seen the replay?
Yes, but that’s me screaming there you know – it f-ing hurts. I also know the bitch held on too long and that I hit the deck pretty hard when she released me.
You still made it back to the corner and came out for the next period
God knows how or why – I’m a fool to myself sometimes. The corner girls asked me if we should throw in the towel and I said no, I don’t quit. That’s true, I’ve never thrown in the towel.
But then you paid the price
Apparently – I do recall going out to face her and being slammed, at least twice. I also remember standing naked with Emily’s help because that bitch Jay wanted me on my feet just so she could say I’d lost. Like I said before, I hate being nude at my age – front and back bottoms should remain hidden.
Why such a prude – you fought nude in some of your earlier bouts?
Yes, but I was 20 years younger then and had a much better figure. Anyway, I’m not a prude – I still get my tits out for you lot. I just don’t want you ogling pussy and ass.
Anyway, back to the fight – you say you don’t recall the last couple of minutes.
I’ve watched the replay and I now know why I ache so much – and why I don’t remember much. I really was out cold at the end; I don’t think I’ve ever been that far out of it.
At this point Jay comes out of the red corner dressing room and spots us.
J: Hello Larry, hanging out with losers again I see.
Hanging out with a heroine in my eyes.
J: As you like – she’s still a loser.
Actually, we have a question for you but first let me say I think you handled tonight’s matches superbly.
J: Thank you Larry, what do you want to know?
E: Why did you just shout ‘start the clock’ when I went for Christine? Why didn’t you stop the fight and warn or disqualify me?
J: Gut reaction, I guess. I’d never seen you get mad before and I was interested to see where it would lead. Besides, I don’t think our customers would have appreciated watching a two-minute match where a naked 47-year-old gets disqualified in her opening move.
E: That’s what we figured. You could have done something to stop her stripping me though…
J: I guess I could have but I didn’t want to. It’s all about the fans at the end of the day and they’re entitled to a little C&A once in a while – even if it is only yours.
E: What do you mean C&A?
J: cxnt and ass, stupid. I half hoped you’d return the complement and pinch her pants – they used to be mine you know.
E: You are joking, aren’t you?
J: No, really, when I checked her before the fight, she said to me “I’m wearing your knickers tonight” and I’m pretty sure she was. I wouldn’t want them back mind – her ass is a lot bigger than mine so they’ll be stretched to hell now.
I told you. She steals everyone’s knickers – but even I didn’t realise she wore them for matches.
E (suddenly downcast): I guess she’ll wear mine when we meet next year, just to taunt me.
Probably – it’s the sort of thing she likes to do, just don’t let it get to you.
J: You live and learn, don’t you? As for you miss Ellie – you need to work on that temper of yours, you’ll never beat Christine if you calm down that quickly.
E: Says one who knows all about beating Christine.
J: I’ll ignore that and just wish you a happy and prosperous New Year – remember there’s a bigger winner’s prize next year. Bye.
She walks up the staircase to the editing suite. Ellen gazes after her with barely concealed frustration.
God I’d love to have another crack at her – but not tonight. Say, you used to be close to her, didn’t you?
Yes – years ago, but it didn’t work out.
Shame – for you I mean.
Maybe, but let’s move on. We all know you took a beating tonight but only you can feel it and you did make the final. Does losing put you off? Will you be back next year?
No, losing doesn’t put me off – losing my knickers does a bit though.
She pauses in thought for a moment.
Yes, I’ll be back and I’ll be out to win – once the bruises have gone down. Losing always hurts the ego as well as the body but I’m pleased to have done so well after so many years out of it.
Any specific targets for next year?
Beating the redhead and winning the tournament, obviously. Like I just said, I’d like a rematch with madam president but I doubt she’d take me on these days. I’d also be up for a tag match if I can find a partner.
At this moment Suzi, who has also fought tonight – beating Gabi to take 3rd place – and will be Ellen’s next opponent in February, walks out of the blue corner dressing room.
E: Hi hon, how are you feeling?
S: Sore – how about you?
E: Yeah, me too – looking forward to next year?
S: A chance to thrash you? – You bet!
E: You’ll be lucky! – Come and give us a Christmas hug, the battle starts next year.
Suzi comes over and the bruised and battered pair embrace cautiously.
E: Gently babe, I ache all over.
S: Mmmm…me too. I’m off, see you next year – and you, Mr. Interviewer, book your appointment for interviewing me when I win the tournament next year.
E (turning to me as S walks out): That told you, but it’s me you need to make the booking with. By the way, why aren’t you interviewing Christine? After all – she won, she’s the champion.
It’s a long story but she doesn’t do interviews with me since I called her a pervey little lezzie who beats people up and nicks their pants.
Hahaha, I bet you didn’t, but I guess you did something to piss her off.
Yes, I did, and I’m not saying what it was. But let’s get back to you. What was the best part of this year for you?
Getting paid my royalties!
You’re joking surely.
I’m serious – I’m a single middle-aged woman and I don’t earn much. I need all the cash I can get and if people want to pay to see me fight live or on video, I’m happy to take their money.
So, you’re only in it for the money?
No, not only the money – I like a good fight, especially when I win.
What was your best fighting moment this year then?
It’s got to be when I flipped Gabi back over those ropes and she dropped to floor KO’d.
And the worst?
Clutching my pussy while I was counted out against the bitch, that just hurt so much.
Thanks very much Ellen and good luck for next year. By the way, I’d just like to say that whatever you might think you’ve still got a great ass.
Thanks hon, see you.
Ellen gets up and heads back to the blue corner dressing room, pausing briefly to bend over, drop her knickers and moon at me before she closes the door.
