... including being a tremendously discreet, fair and kind referee.
Discreet? 
OK, he had lots of amusing anecdotes but never anything nasty. 'Unobtrusive' is the word I was looking for. A lot of refs think it's all about them. Jeff never tried to upstage the girls. What's more, he was never aggressive towards them the way referees often are. It was obvious that he genuinely loved and appreciated them.