I think I just about have my head cleared from the haze and the fog and the spinning when suddenly I feel a SEARING PAIN in the back of my neck that was so irritating and painful I would have sworn it was the same pain I often feel when I hear Sadie's voice...you know...that trailer park twang that you hear when you go thru any Kentucky Fried Chicken Parlor Drive Thru in the South. GAWWDDD! The pain hitting the inside of my head like a jack hammer that is so intense it drives me crazy and gives me the Willie Nelsons!!! I REALIZE EVA HAS ELBOWED ME IN THRE BACK OF THE HEAD AGAIN!!!!! UUUUNNNGGGHHHHHH!!!!!
The pain is excruciating and I drop like a rock to my knees and then foreward to my chest and elbows...going down faster than Bailey between my legs in the back seat of my Range Rover (Bailey...please come see me...we have a few things to "discuss").....I slowly begin to lift my torso up off the canvas...pushing off with my elbows and then with my arms...my right hand coming around and rubbing the back of my neck feverishly to get some feeling..shaking my head back and forth as plant my hands on my thighs and slowly push off HARD TO get to my feet.....FUCKING AGAIN!!!!! I blink my eyes a few times trying to focus and see where I fucking am!....
My body is now completely drenched in perspiration as I slowly get to my feet....hunched over at first and then slowly straightening up...the muscles in my strong legs...my bulging quads now so well defined by the coating of perspiration and the reflective lights....my right hand up behind my neck...rubbing and massaging it to try and reduce the pain and discomfort. My tall athletic frame glistening under the bright overhead ring lights ass I roll my shoulders ...slowly turning back towards the corner where Eva is.....I heat chattering in the background and realize its Carmen and Mari and I quickly turn my head around and look in all directions...almost having to keep it on a swivel after what they have done so far......blinking and squinting ..trying to focus and not panic and worry about those two "midgets". FUCKKKK!!!....they look like the mother fucking "HISPANIC OLSEN TWINS.....MARIE-KATE and ASHLEY!!!............I finally spot the chimps at ringside pounding the ring apron and jumping up and down like like their cute little asses were on fire! I see them pointing up and I place my hands on my hips and tilt my head to the side.....looking at them quizzically. I keep wondering WHY IN THE FUCK I DIDN'T BRING ANYONE WITH ME TO WATCH MY BACK!! Before this is over I know those two "Sadie wannabes" are going to cause me more grief than just a little bit!
I see some some weird looking old dude that looks like he just got out of a half way house after spending 20 years in Alcatraz (and yes...I fucking know its been closed longer than that morons!) at ringside screaming at the top of his lungs...pointing at me.....finally I recognize the old geezer!!.....ITS EMMETT!!!!.....I look back over AT EVA AS SHE IS....... NO WAY?

.......NOW CLIMBING UP AND TRYING TO GET UP ON TOP OF THE TOP ROPE???.....she looks like King Kong trying to climb the Empire State Building!!! .......AND SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE'S GONNA???.........NO WAAAYYYYY?

? MUTHAFUCKA!!!! My legs still a bit wobbly but at least I have my bearings now....when my mouth drops open in a gape as I see that FUCKING EVA UP ON THE TOP ROPE!!! It suddenly flashes thru my mind....something I saw when studying tape of "Eva and her Chimps".....THE ELEVATED CROSS BODY BLOCK MANEUVER!!! I SAW HER DO THIS! HOLY SHIT! (for the uninitiated ...the elevated cross body maneuver the elevated version of the crossbody maneuver in which a wrestler jumps from an elevated position...usually the top turnbuckle....onto an opponent, landing horizontally across the opponent's torso, forcing them to the mat and usually resulting in a pinfall attempt....and I bet you thought I was a wrestling DUMB ASS)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZneT96XaDM(I know the above is Gail Kim but GAWD is she HAWT!)
GOOD GAWD!!!!.....EVA'S SO FAT AND UNCOORDINATED she is having TROUBLE BALANCING herself up on the top rope...her arms outstretched from her sides as she tries to balance herself .....almost like a tight rope walker!
ALL OF A SUDDEN I SEE HER LEAP AT ME CROSS BODY STYLE AND SHE IS YELLING AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS ...I swear to God I think I'm seeing the FIRST HISPANIC ICBM!!!!!!
"CHINGA TU MADRE!"
I think she just told me to go..... FUCK MY MOTHER?

? AAACKKK!!!!!! I suddenly on INSTINCT JUST DIVE FORWARD AND LOW TOWARDS THE BASE OF THE RING POST!!! I SEE THE SCREAMING EVA FLYING OVER HEAD LIKE MEXICANA AIRLINES SCREAMING IN LOW TO THE RUNWAY ABOUT TO CRASH ANOTHER AIRLINER!!!......I scream out myself!!.....with a loud! .....HAAAAA!!!!!!....LIKE I AM SO FUCKING SMART WHEN SUDDENLY!!!!......UNNNNNGGHHH!!!!.....MY OWN HEAD CRACKS INTO THE RING POST!!!!.....padded though it may be I am down like a shot...... moaning as I look back over my shoulder to SEE IF EVA IS STILL AIRBORNE LIKE THE FIRST HISPANIC INTERCONTINENTAL BALLISTIC MISSILE!!!
I slowly roll over to my back..my head and shoulders leaning up against the ring post as my eyes flutter a bit as I only see black for a few seconds......going ......under........