Redhead RoyalFrom the opening bell, an unspoken strategy developed among every woman not named Christina Hendricks; the seven other combatants all ganged up on Hendricks, recognizing her experience and raw power as the greatest specific threat to any of them. Christina struggled mightily, but within a minute of the start of the battle royal, she found herself thrown over the top rope and eliminated.
A heartbeat later, the alliance between those who remained dissolved, and they tore into one another. With an odd number in the ring, one poor girl was double-teamed, and that proved to be Cinita Dicker as she was worked over by Bella Thorne and Debby Ryan. The Brazilian model fought back furiously, but the two Americans managed to muscle her to the cables and, each grabbing a leg, hoisted Dicker up and over, sending her crashing to the arena floor before.
She was joined a moment later by Ryan, courtesy of Thorne, who had instantly turned on her erstwhile compatriot and eliminated her before Debby had any inkling of what was happening.
But even as Bella smugly turns her attention to the melee in the ring, she is met with a stunning judo chop to her chest, courtesy of Karen Gillan, who had broken away from her stalemate struggle with Evan Rachel Wood. Seconds later, Thorne found herself Irish whipped across the ring…but instead of bounding off of the ropes, she seems to intentionally baseball slide under them to the ring floor below. Karen is stunned by her rival’s apparent self-elimination, leaving her attention turned away from the women around her. Isla Fisher takes advantage of that with a dropkick from behind, sending the startled Scot sailing face-first to the canvas.
Yet before Isla can take advantage, Alyson Hannlgan and Evan Rachel Wood break off from their own struggle; Hannlgan lunges at Fisher, and Wood goes after Gillan. Evan pulls the stunned Karen up and locks her up with a Full Nelson. That prompts Alyson and Isla to turn away from each other and turn toward the hapless Gillan. With both redheads balling a fist, they throw simultaneous punches to Karen’s belly, knocking the air from her with a whoosh and leaving her limp as a ragdoll and gasping for breath. That makes it simplicity itself for Wood to pull her rival over to the ropes, hoist her up, and throw her over.
As Evan turns back around however, she is met with a further dual action from Alyson and Isla, as they deliver identical superkicks to Wood; she flips up and over the top rope.
Now only two women are left in the ring. Unlike the previously chaotic brawling, they now cautiously circle one another before locking up. And for the next several minutes they battle to a virtual stalemate, the two beauties too evenly matched to overcome the other. As time passes, it becomes apparent that victory will only come for one if she proves to out-endure her rival, or she just enjoys a stroke of blind luck.
It is perhaps equal parts of both that suddenly tilts the advantage to Fisher, as Hannlgan makes an uncharacteristically sloppy attempt as a clothesline. Isla ducks under it, and in a blue of motion executes a Hurricanrana on the startled Alyson, dropping her to the mat. As Hannlgan scrambles up to her feet, Isla dashes toward her, ducks her head between her opponent’s thighs from behind, and with a grunt lifts Aly up, seated on Fisher’s shoulders!
Isla rushes to the ropes and dips forward, her momentum throwing Hannlgan from her shoulders over the top strand and to the floor below.
Exhausted but beaming a triumphant smile, Isla raises her arms and trots around the ring, reveling in her hard-won victory. But she’s so focused on self-congratulations, she fails to notice that the bell has not tolled.
For the referee had keenly noticed that another participant is not, technically speaking, legally eliminated from this match. For by the rules of the battle royal, a wrestler must be thrown over the ropes, and by voluntarily going under the cables, Bella Thorne is still very much an active combatant. She had remained standing at ringside as the battle raged on, conserving her strength while her rivals eliminated one another. Now, she stealthily slithered under the bottom rope.
The first that Isla realized Bella was there was when she turned and suddenly saw the smirking redhead facing her. Thorne then punted a kick up between Fisher’s thighs, doubling her over with a squeaking grunt. Stepping behind her, Bella wrapped her arms around her adversary’s waist, lifted her up, and brought her crashing back down with an Atomic Drop, Fisher’s already throbbing groin taking the full brunt of the impact.
Lower lip quivering as she fought back tears, Isla found herself hauled back up to her feet by her fiery mane. With one hand still in her opponent’s hair, Thorne grabbed a handful of her tights and yanked them up, giving Fisher a painful wedgie, and with a dip of her knees, Bella threw Isla up and over the ropes, bringing a finale to the match.
The bell clangs the victory toll as Bella triumphantly struts around the ring, the last redhead standing.
