[Anon]

Isla Fisher stood with one hand on the top rope. Her body sagged as she wiped the sweat from her brow, but she still gave Sophia Bush a glare with her teeth clenched. Isla had taken enough bumps during the match that many of them were visible -- a collection of bruises blending into one large bruise on her shoulder, and a scrape on her chin. Standing in the middle of the ring, Sophia looked similar, crouched down and prepared to lunge, but with a cut above her eyebrow and scrapes on her hips.

Isla growled, shoving herself away from the ropes, and rushed at Sophia, leaning forward as if moving to shoulder check the other actress. Sophia jerked backwards at the sudden movement, then darted forward nimbly. Lunging and grabbing Isla's hair, Sophia took control and transformed Isla's charge into an uncontrolled tumble. Sophia spun and ran alongside Isla for a moment, as the other actress stumbled forward, wailing. Isla's loud wails grew sharper for a moment as Sophia finally wrenched the actress off her feet, only to suddenly silence as the two bodies finished their descent and struck the mat. Isla landed face first, limbs shaking, while Sophia landed on her hip an instant later, still clutching the stunned woman's hair.

Quivering weakly, Isla groaned and placed her palms on the mat, slowly rising to her hands and knees. Her long red hair draped downward messily, obscuring her face, as her body tilted awkwardly. "No, I don't think you will," stated Sophia confidently. Climbing onto Isla from behind, Sophia sat upright comfortably on Isla's lower back. Placing a hand on the base of Isla's skull, Sophia smirked and shoved downward.

Already on the verge of collapse even without Sophia's assault, Isla shrieked as her arms gave way. She landed nose first on the mat, completely unable to protect herself. Her arms lay at her sides, palms up. Sophia groaned and rose to a squatting position, giving herself enough space to roll Isla onto her back. The unconscious redhead lay limp, her arm crossing over her own chest loosely before flopping down to the mat again. Sophia scooted up to sit astride Isla's chest, smirking as she brushed the redhead's hair aside to reveal shut eyes, ruined makeup, and a slack jaw.

"This should scare everyone in the dressing room for a day or two," Sophia whispered smugly. Isla's head rolled to the side, resting with her cheek on the mat and her mouth flopping open further, as the referee counted her out.

Isla Fisher


Sophia Bush

[Anon]

Between 1954 and 1955, Marilyn Monroe set out to beat as many of her fellow blonde bombshells as possible in the ring, as part of a campaign to promote The Seven Year Itch. She had no shortage of challengers, and selected a long list of her favorites.

Anita Ekberg



Anita Ekberg gave a stone faced frown as she straightened her arms upwards, holding her rival helplessly overhead. Marilyn's legs twitched beside Anita's shoulder, and she waved one hand weakly. Her head hung low, hiding her battle damaged face from the crowd. Anita strode towards the edge of the ring, then took a single running step and struck the ropes. Marilyn was too dazed to react as she tumbled over the top rope, spinning several times while she was still in the air. By the time Marilyn's back struck the concrete, Anita had already turned away, standing with her hands on her hips, shoulders back, and spine arched. Behind Anita, Marilyn's limbs settled down on the concrete.

Kathleen Hughes



Marilyn clenched her teeth and winced, but she could barely summon the strength to wiggle back and forth. On top of Marilyn, Kathleen Hughes lay with her arms encircling her opponent's neck, and her legs straddling her waist. She held Marilyn's hair tightly in both hands, and pulled back persistently, exposing Marilyn's slender neck. Kathleen had left superficial scratch marks up and down her opponent's arms, face, chest, and back, and Marilyn's shoulder bore a clear set of bite marks as well. Marilyn's hands held Kathleen by the wrist and shoulder, but they produced no pressure on her opponent, merely gripping Kathleen weakly as her arms threatened to collapse. "...please!" Marilyn whispered, breathing hard, but nearly inaudible. "...you win!" Kathleen looked up and smiled brightly. "Hey, you hear that? I beat Marilyn!" As Marilyn's arms fell to the mat, she groaned.

Greta Thyssen



"...and I really hope I don't seem unappreciative. I was so flattered when I got your acceptance letter!" Greta beamed and tilted her head back, seated comfortably on the floor and leaning back on her elbows. Her shapely legs were compressing Marilyn's midsection down, leaving her even more wasp-waisted than usual, and she held Marilyn's head under her arm, squeezing the side of the woman's neck between her bicep and her ribs. Neck bent backwards, with her chin in Greta's armpit, Marilyn grimaced and  tapped on the other woman's arm weakly with both hands, as her legs lay motionless on the mat. "So I hope you aren't too upset. Maybe we can do this again another time?" Marilyn let out a final hissing sigh as her tense frown relaxed, her eyelids fluttered and shut, and her arm fell to her side, fingers curled loosely.

Mamie Van Doren



Marilyn winced. "...but the contract says..." She lay on her stomach, with Mamie Van Doren's butt on her lower back, her arms under Marilyn's armpits, and hands clasped behind her neck. Mamie wiggled and leaned back, stretching Marilyn's spine further. With her feet planted on the floor, Mamie was in no danger of losing her balance. She gripped Marilyn by her short, blonde hair, just above her neck, to be sure. "Never mind the contract! Greta Thyssen beat you. Jayne Mansfield will beat you worse. Just call in sick that day or something so I can have the honor of fighting Jayne instead."

Marilyn wrinkled her nose and let out a single, choking sob. Still, she protested. "But if I back out management will..." Mamie inhaled, looking down incredulously, and pushed her arms together, inching her butt forward and arching her back. The small movement bent Marilyn's spine even further, while threatening to rip her arms from their sockets. Marilyn reflexively stretched her eyes and mouth open wide as she screamed in pain. "You win you win you win!" she babbled, clenching her muscles and kicking against the mat uselessly. Mamie smirked, sat up straight, and let Marilyn's arms slip free, sending the conquered actress' nose crunching into the mat before she could react. "Enjoy your vacation!" Mamie purred.

Barbara Nichols



Marilyn's arms dangled at her sides, swaying slightly. Barbara Nichols' overflowing cleavage obscured most of the dazed actress' face. Only Marilyn's eyes were visible over the top of Barbara's bosom, and she stared upwards. Silently, with her brow furrowed and her eyes forced open, Marilyn pleaded for release. Barbara huffed and lifted slightly. Hugging Marilyn's body and trapping Marilyn's arms at her sides, Barbara had been supporting Marilyn's weight for some time. Now, as Marilyn's head slumped forward, vanishing into Barbara's neckline, her legs fully gave out. Smirking, Barbara raised her fists in victory; Marilyn's face slid down her chest, then her stomach, and finally passed between her legs and collided with the floor.

Brigitte Bardot



Brigitte straightened her arm and twisted her body, swinging the back of her fist out and smirking as her knuckles struck Mariliyn's jaw. "Ungh!" Marilyn blinked and wrinkled her lips into a frown as her head suddenly snapped up and to the side. She flailed an arm in Brigitte's general direction, trying to focus her eyes. Brigitte remained light on her feet, darting forward and raising a fist to strike, only to smile teasingly and bounce away. Marilyn glared at Brigitte and bared her teeth, infuriated by the other actress' carefree taunts. She sprang forward, screeching long and hoarsely, and got halfway through a haymaker aimed at Brigitte's head before Brigitte ducked and charged herself. The two blondes collided violently. Marilyn's fist swished through the air, and her battle cry suddenly became silent as Brigitte's shoulder dented her stomach. Brigitte, legs bent in a crouch, quickly wrapped her arms around Marilyn's thighs. Straightening her body, Brigitte stopped Marilyn's charge completely, and lifted.

"Noo-oooh!" Marilyn wailed mournfully, her voice warbling and rising in pitch as Brigitte raised her up. She spread her arms wide, fingers clawing for any handhold that might save her from the inevitable drop. As Brigitte swung Marilyn downwards, the helpless blonde's cry turned to a gurgle, before instantly silencing as Marilyn's back landed flat on the mat, and her head bounced against it an instant later. Marilyn's flailing arms hung in the air for a moment before descending to the mat and bouncing against it.

Brigitte looked down at Marilyn and tittered at the bruised, slumbering blonde. She amused herself briefly by giving her opponent a few quick, sharp swats with her palm to the chest and face, making Marilyn's unresponsive body wobble on the mat, but eliciting no response. Shrugging, Brigitte arched her back, flattened her body down on top of Marilyn's, and looked to the crowd excitedly for approval.

The following day, Marilyn Monroe cancelled the remaining matches and refused to be seen in public for some time. The resulting complaints from the long list of actresses she skipped generated substantial publicity for the film.

[Anon]

Jane Fonda vs Brigitte Bardot

Jane held her mouth shut tightly. Her chin rested on Brigitte's shoulder, and her slender arms flexed as she continually jostled the other woman in her grip. Brigitte, equally bruised, dug her nails into Jane's upper arms as the rhythmless slow dance continued in the center of the ring. She shifted her weight, preparing to throw a knee up at Jane's midsection, only to stomp and shake as the movement nearly allowed Jane to knock her off her feet.

The two actresses clung to each other tightly as the struggle escalated, with both increasingly unsteady on their feet. As they fought to stay upright, Jane let out a short, high pitched cry. Brigitte and Jane pushed away from each other forcefully, but both sought out new holds on their rivals. Jane caught Brigitte's leotard, while Brigitte clung to Jane's hair. The two fell away from each other, only to jerk to a halt as they reached the ends of their leashes.

Brigitte bared her teeth, but her scowl quickly turned to a frightened gasp as her opponent wrenched backward. Grunting and forcing a backward step with her leg muscles quivering, Jane held Brigitte by the leotard and lifted, sending the surprised blonde actress into an aerial somersault. Losing her grip on Jane's hair, Brigitte wailed as her legs kicked the empty air overhead.

Even before Brigitte struck the mat on her back, Jane had already thrown a leg over the tumbling blonde. Eyes wild and nostrils flared, Jane descended on Brigitte as she hit the ground, landing astride the other actress' chest. It was over in a moment. Brigitte flailed an arm defensively in front of her face, screeching and inching across the mat by arching her back. Jane's fists rose and fell rapidly, swishing past Brigitte's lithe arm and knocking her pretty face every which way. Brigitte, eyes staring ahead blankly, squirmed and gasped one last time. Her body softened as her arms fell away from her face. Her lips separated slightly, but her teeth remained pressed together, as if she were frowning in anger at her defeat even while fast asleep.

Jane, seeing Brigitte collapse, leaned forward and rested her hands on the mat, hair mussed and partially covering her face. Seated on the unconscious woman, her body rising and falling as her breathing returned to normal, Jane finally brushed her hair aside and raised her head. She looked up, wide eyed, as if she had surprised herself with the sudden finish.

Jane


Brigitte

[Jackflash Jump]

The following day, Marilyn Monroe cancelled the remaining matches and refused to be seen in public for some time. The resulting complaints from the long list of actresses she skipped generated substantial publicity for the film.

Epic, my friend!

[Sandman13]

Anon - Impressive! Excellent quick shots and some unusual celebrities. Thanks for taking the time and trouble.

[Anon]

Thanks everybody.

unusual celebrities

I think everyone has strong opinions on the more commonly used celebrities, and different people hold contradictory views. So it's easier for me to write the more obscure bunch, since I'm not violating anybody's expectations. So, expect more of that.

[Anon]

Linda Evans vs Donna Summer

Linda Evans' back bowed, but she clenched her teeth and wrenched herself upright. The blonde stumbled forward, taking a wild right handed swing at Donna Summer's head. Her fist changed course in midair suddenly as her legs nearly crumpled beneath her. With one short step forward, Donna neatly swerved around the punch, bringing up her right fist and smashing her knuckles into Linda's chin in one decisive motion.

The blonde's head stopped with a jolt, and she let out a quiet groan. Unable to summon enough strength to attack, she merely cringed and sank back against the edge of the ring, supporting herself with one hand on the middle rope. Donna trembled, fists clenched and face set in a tight lipped frown, glaring furiously at Linda. As the blonde bent at the waist, Donna tensed and raised her leg, striking her on the jaw. Head flying back, Linda grimaced as she was thrown upright, back to the ropes. She tilted her head up and away, gasping and shaking helplessly. Donna's straight armed punch plowed into her cheek, knocking her head between the top two ropes, and her follow up left hook sent her swaying in the opposite direction. Linda no longer responded  to the individual blows striking her face and chest, merely jiggling as Donna pummeled her.

The defeated actress trembled for a moment, tangled in the ropes, before Donna's green wrestler's boot arced through the air in a roundhouse kick, striking her on the side of the head. The blow was enough to dislodge the stupefied actress from the ropes, yanking her arms free and allowing her to gracefully plummet face first into the ground. Donna strutted back to her corner, not bothering to watch the moment of impact.

Linda Evans


Donna Summer

[Jackflash Jump]

Scarlett Johansson & Kaley Cuoco vs Keeley Hazell & Sayuki Matsumoto





On paper, at least, it was a million dollar idea that couldn't fail:  Team up two of the most popular women in the Hollywood Wrestling Alliance...Scarlett and Kaley; give them a marketable name...'The Blonde Bombers'; and unleash them on the roster.  Without a doubt, they would quickly capture the tag belts, and generate a fortune in merchandising revenue along the way.

Unfortunately, the reality was not quite what was expected.  From the first, it was clear that Johansson and Cuoco hadn't developed a solid team strategy, and instead were working as two solo wrestlers who happen to be paired up.  And while it could be argued that it would be difficult for any pair of individual singles wrestlers to suddenly function as a well-oiled fighting machine their first time out, that theory was blown to pieces by Kaley and Sayuki.  They were not only solo wrestlers who had ever teamed up before tonight, but they also had a language barrier between them.  Nevertheless, from the opening minutes of the match, the two swiftly established dominance, and worked together with the kind of pinpoint precision that usually only the most seasoned teams enjoyed.

As a result, the fans bore witness to the busty blondes being dominated, demolished and demoralized by their even bustier opponents.  By the thirty minute mark, all four grapplers were in the ring, and Scarlett and Kaley were actually starting to enjoy some offense at last; from opposite ends of the squared circle, the blondes began to Irish whip their adversaries, intent on having them collide mid-ring.  However, Keeley and Sayuki managed to reverse the whips, with the result that the Bombers were the ones who found themselves thrown toward one another.  They slammed together chest to chest with loud grunts, then both staggered back, badly stunned on shaky legs.

Hazell and Matsumoto muscled their rivals into opposite corners, then they British and Japanese battlers met in the middle of the ring.  From there they burst forward into a dash, Keeley aiming for Kaley, and Sayuki for Scarlett, and they slammed into their targets with body splashes that hit like wrecking balls; the steel ring posts themselves shook from the impact.  Johansson's D cups and Cuoco's C were flattened, respectively, my Matsumoto's G's and Hazell's EE's.  Astonishingly, the Americans were still clinging to consciousness, but their fans had abandoned all hope of their heroine's somehow turning the match around.  All they could hope for was a quick and merciful end.

But Keeley and Sayuki weren't feeling very merciful.   Peeling their ravaged rivals out of the corners, they dragged them by their tangled flaxen manes back to the center of the ring.  There, the American's were bodyslammed to the canvas, and they lay their side by side, groaning and glassy eyed.

What happened next was as unexpected as it was breathtaking.  Neither Hazell nor Matsumoto were considered high flyers, but now then each began to climb the turnbuckles in corners opposite of one another.  Balancing themselves precariously upon the top ropes, they then flung their lush bodies into the air, turning them into soaring missiles of destruction.

They can crashing down upon their victims, and with such force, the plywood beneath the blondes shattered and the center of the ring caved in!  The fans roared "OMG!  OMG!  OMG!" in unison, and after several long seconds of no sign of life, Keeley and Sayuri began to claw their way out of the hole.  At the bottom of that hole lay Scarlett and Kaley, and if either was still somehow miraculously conscious, she wasn't going to make the effort to try and get up.  Better to take the twenty count and the loss than to endure any more of this mauling.

And thus was the debut of the Blonde Bombers also their swan song.  The t-shirts sat unsold in a warehouse, the actions figures halted before they ever reached the production line.  And Scarlett and Kaley never wanted to hear about tag teaming together ever again!

[Jackflash Jump]

Flashback 1979: Barbi Benton vs Audrey Landers



For Audrey, it would be the catfighting career highlight that would propel her to the uppermost ranks.  It had begun two months earlier in New York, where in a penthouse towering above Manhattan, the blonde had scored a surprising but decisive win over Barbi.  Then, just to prove that win wasn't a fluke, she repeated her victory last month in Las Vegas.  Now, Landers would fight the celebrated brunette for a third and final time.  Geographically, there was never any question that the battle would take place on the West Coast.  But what did shock many was when Audrey insisted it be held at the Playboy Mansion.

Everyone knew why she wanted the match there.  As Hugh Hefner's former girlfriend, Benton was the Queen of the Playboy Mansion.  To have her defeated there would be a massive humiliation for the brunette...which was precisely what Audrey intended.

But if the blonde thought that the idea of losing on her own home turf would demoralize Barbi, she swiftly found herself proven wrong.  Indeed, fighting at the mansion galvanized Benton, and she shook off any feelings of inadequacy she held from her previous two loses.

Landers battled magnificently, but Barbi was all of that and more, brilliantly countering her rival's moves time and again.  Both beauties were running on fumes as the brawl made it to the 45 minute mark, and each knew she had to finish off the other now, because they had nothing left for later.

Swinging a wild punch, Audrey hoped to level Barbi with a haymaker.  But her movements were sluggish, and the brunette was narrowly able to avoid the flailing fist aimed at her jaw.  With Landers off-balance, the brunette went for her finisher; she pulled the blonde's curvaceous body across her shoulders and, with a grunt, stood up, subjecting Audrey to a torture rack!

The blonde's screams filled the air as Barbi, her face a mask of determination, bounced up and down on her feet to increase her victim's agony.  It seemed to go on forever, but in fact it was barely fifteen seconds of this punishment before Audrey was shrieking her surrender.  Benton kept her in the hold for a few more seconds, just to make sure the blonde fully understood just how defeated she was, and then she shrugged her off and let the sobbing Landers land on the floor with a heavy thud.

Flashback 1979:  Erin Gray vs Persis Khambatta



The crowd let out a roar of approval as Erin locked on her devastating finishing hold, the Texas Clover Leaf.  No one in the HWA had ever been able to escape it, nor endure it for more than a minute at most.  Gray gave a satisfied half-smile as she heard her opponent let out a growl of pain.

Except it was more than just pain...it was determination.  Persis gritted her teeth and, as her growl escalated into a roar, she began to do that which was previously impossible...power out of Gray's Clover Leaf!  The smile disappeared from Erin's face and was replaced with wide-eyed shock.  Then, with a sudden flex of her shapely legs, the exotic Indian breaks the hold and throws her tormentor tumbling over to the mat.

Gray crashes face down to the mat.  Lifting her head, her features betray her shock.  Indeed, she is so startled by this turn of events, she can only lay there stunned, uncertain of what to do next.  Unfortunately for Erin, Persis knows precisely what she must do.  Even as her own body still suffers from the aches of the Clover Leaf, the raven-tressed beauty musters to power to move with unexpected swiftness, and in a blur of motion she has secured her own finisher on Gray, the Indian Death Lock.

Now Erin screams in anguish, and her frantic efforts to power out amount to nothing.  It's Khambatta's turn to smile as her victim howls in agonized protest.  Tears streaming down her face, Erin's hand begins to frantically slap at the canvas...but still Persis refuses to release her.  Now Gray must humble herself by begging for her torture to end.  After several long, painful moments, the Indian finally consents to end her opponent's suffering, and she releases her hold as the referee calls for the bell.

[Freefall]

Finish Her- Queen of the Beach
Kylie Jenner vs Scarlett Johansson




Scarlett Johansson is shaken from the beating she endured…Jenner and a concerned audience can feel it. Kylie roars from her corner meeting the blonde screen heroine barely leaving hers. Kylie wipes away Scarlett's fading guard with disarming ease. Kylie buries an undefended uppercut into Scarlett's solar plexus ejecting the air from the actress's lungs. The Scarjo is staggered and stunned looking for air and sustains a big right to the temple. Scarlett raised her mitts to her head and pays for it as Kylie skillfully tears into her tits. Left Right Up and Down the 22-year-old works Johannson's revered rack like a polished veteren beyond her years.

 Scarlett moans as her her cups are used as target practice. Kylie delights as she hammers away finally pouncing on her prey. Jenner shows her fangs and smashes Scarlett's left boob ejecting it from her overworked top. The modest Oscar winner panics and tries to cover up exposing herself to more punishment. Johansson succeeds in fixing her wardrobe malfunction but at great cost as Jenner detonates a haymaker to her temple. Scarlett pirouettes 180 degrees before her legs give out and she collapses tits up in middle of the ring. The Ref has seen enough ScarJo is cooked and the bell is called for

A blonde bombshell busting KO for Kylie the Billionaire b*tch Jenner


Boos and trash are hurled at the ring as Jenner celebrates her demolition of the celebrated veteran. Scarlett is in a world of hurt…. She awakens from her brief loss of consciousness in a panic as she sees Kylies infamous black-clad bikini bottoms blotting out the arena lights. Jenner stands over Johannson soaking in the attention before plopping her ass on Johannson face. Using her nose as a stool. Kylie squeals with a vile delight as she grinds and gyrates her hips letting her cheeks snuff out the shattered blonde. Johansson's arms and legs flay in panic but neither can defend her cherished breasts from what’s coming. Kylie rotates her self 180 degrees and begins to lay waste to Scarlett's rack. Undefended shots reign straight down on Scarlett's quivering juggs alternating like engine pistons. All poor Johansson can do is scream into Jenners all-conquering glutes as the billionaire b*tch reduces her famous rack to rubble.

It's all too much for the Avenger as she expels the last of oxygen into her black bikini-clad tomb shudders and passes out. Kylie feels her foe go limp and relents her merciless assault. Jenner arrogantly calls for her iPhone and snaps an internet melting selfie perched on her well-earned seat. With that Kylie Jenner has announced her intentions to rule the world.

[Anon]

"They might as well put Carole in the ring with a tiger. Or they could save even more time by sending her straight to the chair," said Joan Bennett. Though they sat facing each other at the small, circular table, the two elegantly dressed women angled their bodies to face the central ring. Anne Baxter nodded, eyes focused on the two struggling figures. "It's barbaric," she agreed. Carole Landis let out another terrified scream as her feet left the mat once again, kicking her legs over her head as Yvonne de Carlo flipped her in midair, before the inevitable collision with the ground drove the air from her lungs and muted her. The two spectators watched silently, but as nearby tables broke into applause, they clapped quietly as well.

Joan suddenly directed her gaze to Anne. "Say," she began. "I can't believe you'd show up to watch Yvonne, much less clap for her. You know, after what she..." Anne turned her head to Joan, ignoring the fight for the first time in minutes. She kept her expression steadfastly indifferent, but the look itself was enough to interrupt Joan. "Oh, I never miss a chance to see Carole pulverized," explained Anne, returning her attention to the action. In the ring, Carole grunted, squirming from a seated position in the corner, with her arms covering her face. Yvonne's boot rose and fell, pounding Carole's vulnerable chest and stomach. "I don't care who's doing the pulverizing. Besides, that was last year." As Yvonne snarled and grabbed Carole by the ankles to haul her away, Anne began to applaud again, encouraging the nearby tables to clap as well.

"I can't stand Carole either," replied Joan, speaking softly and adjusting herself in her chair. "In a week or two she'll be showing her face in public like nothing happened. It just makes me so-oooh!" As Joan sat up straight, covering her mouth with one hand, the other spectators echoed her outburst. Yvonne stood outside of the ring and hauled Carole out by the legs, bouncing the back of her head against the edge of the ring as she made her pitiful exit. With her arms dragging behind her on the mat, Carole showed no sign of noticing. Yvonne lowered her body slightly, and slid the unconscious blonde onto her shoulders, placing one hand under her chin and the other between her legs. Yvonne dug her nails in and pulled down forcefully, but even as she clawed Carole's body and bent her spine backwards, the blonde's arms and legs swayed gently as she slept through the experience.

Yvonne strutted around the perimeter of the ring, passing by each table in turn, showing Carole's blank, open mouthed expression to the spectators up close. Anne sipped her drink and stared straight ahead as the combatants passed by, only turning her eyes to Joan once Yvonne had exited backstage with her prize.

Yvonne


Carole


Joan


Anne

[Sandman13]

Anon - All I can muster is a "Wow!" for the latest post. Yvonne is certainly a good choice for a juggernaut and Carole is also a great "face". If I could be so bold, I'd like to nominate Ella Raines, Jean Arthur and maybe Alexis Smith for a quick shot sometime.

[Jackflash Jump]

Anon, this is simply spectacular! 

[Anon]

Thanks everybody!

As for Ella Raines, Jean Arthur, and Alexis Smith, I think they've all been on my long list at one point or another. They may get a turn at some point.

[Jackflash Jump]

Santa's Naughty List

They try to be nice, but as they soon discover, it's much more fun being naughty!

Kristin Kreuk vs Sarah Michelle Gellar



The two beauties, their nude bodies glistening under the lights of the penthouse, grunted and gasped as they struggled for control.  Suddenly Kristin grasped her rival's wrist and attempted to twist her arm, but Sarah deftly countered, and in a blur of motion, she was suddenly behind the brunette and putting the pressure on a hammerlock.  Kreuk let out a sharp grunt from the pain to her arm, and she knew that if the blonde were allowed to maintain this hold, it wouldn't be long before Kristin submitted.  Still, she also knew she still had a slim chance of turning the battle around.

Unable to resist taunting her longtime arch-enemy, Gellar leaned her head in close to Kreuk.  Her mouth opened, but before she could utter a single syllable, the brunette's free hand suddenly shot up like a viper, her fingers jabbing at her tormentor's eyes.  Sarah shrieked as she was momentarily blinded, releasing her hammerlock.  Wasting no time, Kreuk brought her hands up, wrapped them about the blonde's head, and sat down hard to the floor; pulled down by the motion, Sarah's jaw slammed against Kristin's shoulder with a crude stunner, leaving her glassy-eyed and splayed across the carpet.

Swiftly pushing her opponent onto her belly, Kristin grabbed her own discarded bikini panties from the floor and stuffed them into her rival's mouth.  Kreuk then stood up, planted her feet against the back of Sarah's knees and hooked the blonde's feet against her attacker's shins; the brunette then reached downward and grasped Gellar's wrists in order to pull her arms backward.  Throwing herself with all the force she could muster onto her back, Kristin lifted Sarah up and held her aloft in a Mexican Ceiling Hold.

The embattled blonde howled in anguish as her full body weight was concentrated on her own knees and shoulders, her lithe body held up like a sacrificial offering to the catfighting gods.  She squirmed helplessly, the agony quickly unbearable.  But her muffled submissions went unheeded, as the garment was shoved into her mouth and preventing her from speaking.  After nearly two minutes of this torture, Gellar could no longer withstand it and she passed out from the pain.

The only upside to being knocked out was that she was spared the sight of her hated rival preening and posing in triumph over her limp body.

Kristen Stewart vs Emma Watson



Kristen gurgled, a trickle of drool in the corner of her mouth as her eyes rolled upwards in their sockets.  She then went limp.  Emma smirked as she released her sleeper hold, letting her adversary collapse in a heap to the carpeted floor.  "Passing out this quickly?" the British lass taunted her slumbering foe.  "You used to be made of tougher stuff.  I guess you've just grown weak."

With a sudden eruption of motion, Stewart lashed out her right leg with a mule kick, her heel smashing squarely into Watson's groin.  The English girl let out a mewling wail and staggered backward while her American rival climbed back up to her feet.  "And you've grown stupider," she says with a cruel smile as she advances on Emma.  "Only an idiot would fall for me playing possum like that.  As if your pathetic sleeper could ever knock me out!"  Emma tried to ward off Kristen with one hand while the other clutched at her throbbing womanhood, but Stewart had little trouble positioning herself behind the Brit; wrapping her arms around Watson's waist, Stewart gave a grunt as she lifted the other brunette up, only to bring her back down again for an Atomic Drop.  Emma's crotch took the fool brunt of the impact, and the force sent her sailing forward until she crashed face-first to the floor, where she lay moaning in anguish.

Grabbing her opponent by the ankles, she flipped Emma over onto her back.  Then, holding her legs wide, the American menacingly hovered her foot over her rival's much-maligned groin.  With tears in her eyes, Watson's open hands 'window washed' the air as she pleaded, "No...don't...please!" But such a plea for mercy brought nothing but scorn from Kristen, who laughed maniacally as she proceeded to stomp her foot down again and again, until finally the agonizing barrage drove the Brit into a semi-conscious stupor, and into inglorious defeat.

Amanda Seyfried vs Michelle Trachtenberg



It was dubbed the 'Battle of Santa's Helpers', and like all previous encounters between elfen-clad Amanda and Michelle, it was savage, breathtaking and utterly magnificent.  But now, after a grueling contest, it appeared as if victory was within the grasp of one beauty.

Seyfriend lay stunned on the floor as her longtime rival sat on her chest.  Michelle and Amanda were the possessors of two of the most perfect derrieres in Hollywood, and the signature finishing move for each was the facesit smother.  So obviously being able to inflict this move over the other was a moment of supreme satisfaction for the winner, and abject humiliation for the loser.  The look of supreme satisfaction on Trachtenberg's face was unmistakable as she slid herself backward until her rear end snugly covered the mouth and nose of her victim, all but cutting off her oxygen.  Looking back over her shoulder at her embattled rival, Michelle smirked and purred, "Get ready for a good long ride, cupcake...this is at the top of my Christmas list!"

But had the brunette not been so concerned about taunting her foe, she would have noticed Seyfried blindly lifting her legs.  A moment later, Michelle let out a yelp as Amanda's limbs clamped around her head, and in a blur of motion jerked downward, sending Trachtenberg smashing face-first into the floor, and leaving her in a daze.

Now free of the smother, the blonde gulped in air.  She knew she needed time to more fully recover, but that was a luxury she didn't have.  With a groan she forced herself to sit up, and then roll over to her knees.  Trachtenberg was just coming out of her daze, but before the brunette could go back on the attack, she felt a hand in her hair, which jerked her head upward.  An instant later, the knuckle of Amanda's right fist began to grind into Michelle's right eye, drawing a shriek from her.  Half-blinded, the brunette took several moments to shake off the pain and clear her vision.  Seyfried put those precious moments to good use.

Clamboring up to her feet, she went over to a nearby sofa and, after motioning an occupant...like all of the spectators, quite wealthy and powerful in Hollywood...to vacate, she climbed up onto it and carefully balanced herself upon the arm of the couch.  Meanwhile, Michelle struggled back up to her feet, then turned around to ascertain where her opponent is.  It was at that moment that Amanda leapt off of the sofa and delivered a brutal dropkick to her rival's chest.  Michelle went sailing back through the air and landed on the floor with a heavy thud, where she lay moaning and badly stunned.

Now it was Seyfried's turn to sit astraddle on her hated foe.  She made a production out of flipping up the fur-fringed micro skirt of her mini-dress, revealing a pair of red panties across which her butt was written in white script, Oh what fun it is to ride!

"Ohhhh...noooooooo!" Trachtenberg mewled as she saw her adversary's posterior descend down upon her face, and then her protests were muffled.  She squirmed feebly beneath her tormentor, but to no avail.  Firmly ensconced atop her rival and beaming a toothy smile of vainglorious delight, Amanda took a special glee in grinding her hips as she drove Michelle into inky devastation.

When Trachtenberg awoke after some indeterminate span of time, it was to find herself stripped nude and hogtied in the middle of the room with a long length of velvet ribbon, and a boy stuck to the top of her head, there to remain while the party went on around her, and the victorious Amanda was feted as Santa's favorite elf.

Jennifer Love Hewitt vs Kaley Cuoco



How quickly they forget.

Celebrated as one of the greatest celebrity catfighters of her time when she retired several years ago, Jennifer became rapidly dismayed as she saw her fighting accomplishments swiftly forgotten, and her legacy disappear.  Younger girls commanded the spotlight now, and that galled the proud brunette.  She had left the sport at the very peak of her powers, and she was convinced she was still every bit as good as she ever was.  Finally she could take the obscurity no longer, and she announced that she was coming back.  Furthermore, she demanded a match against the current top girl, Kaley.

The odds makers favored Cuoco.  After all, Hewitt inevitably had to have 'ring rust', and even if she didn't, nearly all agreed that blonde Kaley is one of the all-time catfighting greats.  Doubtless she would quickly send Jen scurrying back to retirement.

But what they...and Cuoco...did not anticipate was that this was not the same J-Love who had wowed spectators in combat until just a few short years ago.  Being forgotten raised a bitterness in her.  Once, she had been the staunchest proponent of good sportswomanship.  Now, she was determined to do whatever it takes to win.

Kaley never knew what hit her.

Few could ever remember having seen such a one-sided domination.  From the opening moments, Hewitt indulged in a slew of dirty moves, quickly tearing to shreds her opponent's defenses.  And Jen wasn't just cheating...she was taking a clear delight in just being mean.

At the moment, she had Cuoco howling in agony.  With the blonde on her knees, Hewitt planted a foot between her embattled adversary's shoulder blades, while with both hands she grasped the straps of Kaley's bra.  Yanking back on the fabric with all of her might, Jennifer used the cups of her buxom rival's own top to savagely maul her breasts!  The garment was too well made to tear, even under these conditions, so the blonde had no relief as she moaned and sobbed in anguish, her strength draining by the instant.

When she had finally bored with this torture, Hewitt decided to finish her foe off at last.  Shoving the stunned Kaley onto her back, the brunette pinned her down and dropped her own impressive rack down upon Cuoco's sweaty face, administering a breath-stealing 'jugging' that robbed the blonde of whatever senses she had left.